Unformatted Attachment Preview
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
Dear Marife,
I am returning this paper ungraded to give you an opportunity to make
revisions and earn a higher score. This essay should focus on one specific type of
technology. All technology is too broad a topic, as technology includes light bulbs,
cars, kitchen appliances, computers, smartphones, and medical equipment. The
essay later seems to focus on communications technology, but even this is too
broad. It includes television, phones, internet, social media, etc. Additionally, there
are many instances of vague and confusing wording. I have provided instructions
to guide you through the revision process. When you have made all necessary
changes, please resubmit this essay.
Warm regards,
Instructor at Penn Foster
Here are the organization instructions:
I. Introduction
A. Grab reader’s attention (Hook)
B. Background Information
1. Information Piece 1
2. Information Piece 2
C. Thesis Preview
D. Thesis with Preview of Main Points (main arguments)
II. Topic Sentence of Body Paragraph 1- First Previewed Main Point (in the writer’s own words)
A. Support and Elaboration- Ties back to topic sentence
B. Support and Elaboration- Ties back to topic sentence
C. Support and Elaboration- Ties back to topic sentence
D. Transition to the Next Paragraph
III. Topic Sentence of Body Paragraph 2- Second Previewed Main Point (in the writer’s own
words)
(continue as with Body Paragraph 1)
IV. Topic Sentence of Body Paragraph 3- Third Previewed Main Point (in the writer’s own
words)
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
(continue as with Body Paragraph 1)
V. Consider the Opposition
VI. Conclusion
A. Rephrase Thesis Preview
B. Summarize Main Points
C. Rephrase/restate thesis
D. Concluding Sentence
Implications of Modern Technology on Human Life
The one feature of the technological world is about its consistency in dynamics and
Commented [BR1]: Nice formatting.
development. In drawing a comparison line while evaluating the changes and events taking
place in the technology world, it is precisely evident that the results or outcomes are
overwhelming. Technological development remains the driving force for the general changes
Commented [BR2]: What do you mean by this?
in human life and the growth in political, and to a broader perspective, the economic sector
(Long, Richard Pg 23). One area of modern technology that is inevitable is its impact on
human life. The concept of contemporary technology draws conflicting debates and
conclusions from various schools of thought, where one end thinks it is advantageous while
the other group clings on its negative contributions. Despite these, it is evident that modern
technology is far much beneficial given its participation in various sectors of any economy,
Commented [BR3]: This should be “more.”
its global compatibility and its sole influence in changing communication from traditional
methods by noting the vast post-modern benefits it displays.
The modern technology is part and parcel of human life in close to all aspects. The
Commented [BR4]: You should be focusing on one kind
of technology. All technology is too broad a topic for this
essay.
global community tends to rely on it so much because of the numerous benefits attached or
Commented [BR5]: This paragraph needs a topic
sentence that mentions the first reason named in your
thesis statement – the role of technology in economy.
packaged to it. Research proves that technology is the current backbone of every economic
Commented [BR6]: Unnecessary words.
development, and its contributions are diverse ranging from communication, manufacturing
to socialization among others. The study, however, narrows down to the communication facet
based on the perspective of the modern development. The current technology has
Commented [BR7]: What study?
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
dramatically improved the communication system by enhancing the growth and emergence of
several platforms for the same, and this shift increases the human dependence on technology.
Commented [BR8]: The same what?
Modern technology triggers communication efficiency where accessing encoded information
Commented [BR9]: People have been dependent on
technology for a long time – electricity, cars, garage doors,
security systems, etc.
is more comfortable and faster. As it is well known, information is part and parcel of human
Commented [BR10]: What do you mean by this?
life, and for any activity to hold there has to be a source of a substantial amount of data
passed to the receiving end.
The technological advancement has outclassed the ancient approaches rendering their
contributions insignificant or at times irrelevant based on speed. It will not be sensible to
carry out an activity in an ancient slow manner when there is an alternative that is much
better and can yield positive results under similar circumstances and at a cheaper cost. After
such a consideration, it is evident that reliance on modern technology is one aspect that
cannot be ignored, not by anybody who is sober and wants to attain or deliver quality.
Communication and information exchange is one area experiencing tremendous
impacts of the modern technology that increases the reliability of people on the new
development. It has various implications based on contemporary events, and the first is on the
efficiency of exchanging information (Rasmussen, pg 17). Due to the improvement in the
Commented [BR11]: Wordiness.
Commented [BR12]: What events?
technology used in information transfer, people all over the world can communicate in
several ways by making phone calls, text messages, emails, and other media.
The quality of the communication also counts since the modern means is curbing
every likelihood of distortion. Initially, it was challenging to pass information from one
source to another because of the distance and at times due to the choice channels or the
messenger in some cases changed the message or its intensity. Modern technology has
changed this by making it easier to communicate instantly with somebody who is millions of
miles away while passing the information directly without having to take it through another
Commented [BR13]: What kind of distortion?
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
person who may alter the meaning or engage signals that stand an easy misinterpretation
chance.
Modern technology is as well more economical in facilitating communication as
compared to the old approaches that were used to pass information; with the introduction of
modern ways of communication systems where one can declare information to a large group
instantly via the social media or any other relevant channels, it has become cheaper. Initially,
it was quite difficult to give information to a group or on a platform that would reach a large
group instantly; one had to gather the audience to pass a piece of information. The old
approach was quite expensive and uneconomical compared to the modern means that will
reach to the target audience at the comfort of wherever they are.
The fascination nature of human beings always triggers upon exposure to new ideas
or products, which is the exact experience with the latest technology and thus making it gain
a very high level of reliance. Modern technology has several positive effects that increase the
reliance levels from the people adopting the system. Advanced technology has improved the
communication system in several ways, among them is attaining a faster and more efficient
Commented [BR14]: Comma splice.
information transfer, thus attracting more people to use the channel. The communication
Commented [BR15]: What channel?
channel was initially very tiresome and inefficient as compared to the resulting modern
Commented [BR16]: What channel?
technology system. When the advanced technology came with the upgrade and better version,
Commented [BR17]: Which technology system?
the consumers of the services had no choice but to embrace the new improvement.
The other benefit that has come due to the reliance on this particular technology is in
Commented [BR18]: What advanced technology?
Commented [BR19]: Better version of what?
Commented [BR20]: What particular technology?
the education sector. Communication by definition is primarily the passing of information
from one person who is the source, to another that is the receiver with the aim of getting
feedback. The concept holds in various educational institutions where there is message
delivery to the respective students by the instructor, and then the input comes when the
Commented [BR21]: It is not necessary to define
communication. Your reader will know what
“communication” means.
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
students perform accordingly in their various examinations or assignments. Through
technology, the world has quickly become a global community or village where people learn
multiple languages or take their courses online at their domestic countries. In the end it has
made it possible to qualify for employment in other countries across the world.
Modern technology has succeeded in ensuring that the academic information is passed
effectively from the instructors to the students through the introduction of the online
education approach. It is this system of education that resulted from the modern technology
and its implication in communication does not necessarily need the students to converge at
one single place to get the information. The instructors can pass across resource materials
through media such as email, dashboard or any other tool, and it gets to the students. There is
some attraction that has come with the approach, and the people have greatly benefited from
Commented [BR22]: What do you mean by this?
relying on technology.
There are also some elements of entertainment packaging the modern technology that
also work pretty well and are quite attractive to various people. In the previous years there
were minimal ways for entertainment, for example, if it were a program on the television it
would last for a brief time, and if one is busy somewhere, he or she will miss it all. The
modern technology has changed this since one can actually save whatever has happened in
the system and then watch later when there is time (Newton et al., Pg 23). The internet also
makes the process much simpler since one can easily access news that they were was not in a
position to follow maybe due to prevailing commitments and responsibilities when the
information came.
In the same entertainment sector, modern technology has also seen the introduction of
new and more advanced equipment, for instance the launch of smart and digital LCD
televisions that produce better quality pictures as compared to the initial analogue
Commented [BR23]: What is “entertainment packaging”?
Commented [BR24]: What previous years?
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
counterparts. Entertainment also fall under communication in that some information has to be
Commented [BR25]: Incorrect subject-verb agreement.
transferred from the entertainment source, be it music or television, which has to get to the
targeted audience to attain the outlined objectives.
Commented [BR26]: This is not necessary to mention.
There has been some improvement in the health industry as a result of the efficiency
in the transfer of information due to the introduction of modern technology in
communication. Majority of health centers, which are the hospitals and dispensaries, have
Commented [BR27]: This should be “the.”
implemented the use of modern equipment in their various operations. Current
communication technology has well made it quite easy for the transfer of crucial health
information that may be needed urgently to save a life. The achievement has been via modern
electronic tools that have all the patients’ report and history while screening the spread of a
Commented [BR28]: This word should be plural.
disease within the human system with fractions of a second. Again various health facilities
have modern tools coordinated with the government bodies to inform of looming health
outbreaks, therefore, enhancing the mitigation process.
Despite the many benefits and the numerous advantages displayed, there are some
claims of negative impacts resulting from relying on modern technology. The first one is the
quick spread of inappropriate information through the social media platform and other media
Commented [BR29]: What do you mean by this?
of communication (Crowley, David, and Heyer Pg 16). Technology has made it easy to
upload and spread information, as videos or in other forms, to various media such as
YouTube, Facebook, Whatsup, and Instagram among others on the internet. In as much as
this is important by making it easy to reach a large audience when the information is
misleading or viral, it can cause a lot of harm (Brown, John Seely, and Paul Duguid, pg. 14).
Another problem is the over-reliance on the use of modern technological resulting in
an addiction syndrome in most teenagers and some adults. Majority of the youths have
become addicted to social media thus making it difficult for them to concentrate on other
Commented [BR30]: Do you have statistics that prove
this? If you make a grandiose claim like “most,” you must
prove it with statistics from a credible source.
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
vital issues such as their jobs and academics. There is so much communication going on in
the social media platform that the youths have interest in, and they keep following; many are
so much obsessed with Facebook, Twitter, Skype, and Instagram among others while
neglecting other vital responsibilities.
There are also claims concerning financial factors to have negative implications from
modern technology used in communication. It is the cost of the equipment employed in
Commented [BR31]: What equipment?
facilitating the communication process that seems high since at times one needs to acquire the
same. In as much as the cost factors are not very pleasing, one has to purchase this equipment
to remain updated with the trends. These costs have affected individuals by increasing their
spending on technology. There is also the training expense usually included in the
technology. The modern technology is sometimes quite complicated and to understand how
to operate the equipment, companies and individuals spend a lot of money training their
people on the usage and management of the same.
The other limitation that the modern technology in communication has brought is the
insecurity of the information that passes through the channels. Advanced technology has
brought this criterion of preserving personal data in one system. The approach is perilous
because in case of an attack there is so much at risk of destruction or getting into the wrong
hands (Newton et al., Pg. 6). An example is the growing cyber-attack instances (Haff, and
Peter, pg. 12). The risk of exposing confidential information makes it essential for
organizations to put up some substantial amount of money to set up security systems to
ensure safety.
The over-reliance in modern technology also prompts an adverse implication on the
human lifestyle. Due to the ease of transferring information, the general lifestyle significantly
changes since there is no need for one to cover long distances to pass information hence the
Commented [BR32]: What channels?
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
exposure to a higher risk of disease invasions (Katz, James pg 18). There is no longer need to
rely on the old approaches of passing information instead they have just adjusted to
transferring the same at the comfort of wherever they are using the new equipment.
It is indeed true that modern technology has a vast impact on the life of every person,
thus influencing various sectors of the economy. By comparing the discussed cost-benefit
analysis of advanced technology while considering the current developments, it remains a
vital tool in human life. One can mention education, employment, health, economic growth
amidst other things that remain fundamental. The wave of technology cost has been a debate,
but upon selecting an efficient and appropriate durable means, the short term expenses shall
be overruled since the long-term gains are far much more significant. The issue of cyber
security and bullying is easily solved using modern technology unlike in the past. Therefore,
Commented [BR33]: How so?
upon optimal application, advanced technology is the best tool that every household,
organization, and country needs to enhance daily operations. In communication, the health
sector and the government are huge beneficiaries when it comes to mitigating a predicated
condition.
Additionally, the government also stands an added advantage of guarding the national
borders when a terror alarm rings. The benefits have made modern technology quite attractive
Commented [BR34]: Do not introduce new information
in the conclusion.
for the people who have increased reliance on it. The changes are impressive since they carry
huge benefits that motivate the people to rely more on technology. It is, therefore, critical for
the people to have significant knowledge of both sides of modern technology so that they can
be well informed when putting them into practice.
Commented [BR35]: Your conclusion must mention your
three reasons and reinforce the thesis statement.
Marife Holmes # 22700036
23035 Harper Ave. Apt B
Port Charlotte, FL 33980
feholmes37@gmail.com
Exam # 500507
Work Cited
Brown, John Seely, and Paul Duguid. The Social Life of Information: Updated, with a New
Preface. Harvard Business Review Press, 2017.
Crowley, David, and Paul Heyer. Communication in history: Technology, culture, society.
Routledge, 2015.
Haff, Peter K. "Technology as a geological phenomenon: implications for human wellbeing." Geological Society, London, Special Publications 395.1 (2014): 301-309.
Katz, James E. Machines that become us: The social context of personal communication
technology. Routledge, 2017.
Long, Richard J. New office information technology: Human and managerial implications.
Routledge, 2018.
Newton, Victoria, Alexander Greenberg, and Judi See. "Project Management Implications
and Implementation Roadmap of Human Readiness Levels." International Conference
on HCI in Business, Government, and Organizations. Springer, Cham, 2017.
Rasmussen, Terje. Social theory and communication technology. Routledge, 2018.
Exam # 500507
Implications of Modern Technology on Human Life
The one feature of the technological world is about its consistency in dynamics and
development. In drawing a comparison line while evaluating the changes and events taking
place in the technology world, it is precisely evident that the results or outcomes are
overwhelming. Technological development remains the driving force for the general changes
in human life and the growth in political, and to a broader perspective, the economic sector
(Long, Richard Pg 23). One area of modern technology that is inevitable is its impact on
human life. The concept of contemporary technology draws conflicting debates and
conclusions from various schools of thought, where one end thinks it is advantageous while
the other group clings on its negative contributions. Despite these, it is evident that modern
technology is far much beneficial given its participation in various sectors of any economy,
its global compatibility and its sole influence in changing communication from traditional
methods by noting the vast post-modern benefits it displays.
The modern technology is part and parcel of human life in close to all aspects. The
global community tends to rely on it so much because of the numerous benefits attached or
packaged to it. Research proves that technology is the current backbone of every economic
development, and its contributions are diverse ranging from communication, manufacturing
to socialization among others. The study, however, narrows down to the communication facet
based on the perspective of the modern development. The current technology has
dramatically improved the communication system by enhancing the growth and emergence of
several platforms for the same, and this shift increases the human dependence on technology.
Modern technology triggers communication efficiency where accessing encoded information
is more comfortable and faster. As it is well known, information is part and parcel of human
life, and for any activity to hold there has to be a source of a substantial amount of data
passed to the receiving end.
Exam # 500507
The technological advancement has outclassed the ancient approaches rendering their
contributions insignificant or at times irrelevant based on speed. It will not be sensible to
carry out an activity in an ancient slow manner when there is an alternative that is much
better and can yield positive results under similar circumstances and at a cheaper cost. After
such a consideration, it is evident that reliance on modern technology is one aspect that
cannot be ignored, not by anybody who is sober and wants to attain or deliver quality.
Communication and information exchange is one area experiencing tremendous
impacts of the modern technology that increases the reliability of people on the new
development. It has various implications based on contemporary events, and the first is on the
efficiency of exchanging information (Rasmussen, pg 17). Due to the improvement in the
technology used in information transfer, people all over the world can communicate in
several ways by making phone calls, text messages, emails, and other media.
The quality of the communication also counts since the modern means is curbing
every likelihood of distortion. Initially, it was challenging to pass information from one
source to another because of the distance and at times due to the choice channels or the
messenger in some cases changed the message or its intensity. Modern technology has
changed this by making it easier to communicate instantly with somebody who is millions of
miles away while passing the information directly without having to take it through another
person who may alter the meaning or engage signals that stand an easy misinterpretation
chance.
Modern technology is as well more economical in facilitating communication as
compared to the old approaches that were used to pass information; with the introduction of
modern ways of communication systems where one can declare information to a large group
instantly via the social media or any other relevant channels, it has become cheaper. Initially,
Exam # 500507
it was quite difficult to give information to a group or on a platform that would reach a large
group instantly; one had to gather the audience to pass a piece of information. The old
approach was quite expensive and uneconomical compared to the modern means that will
reach to the target audience at the comfort of wherever they are.
The fascination nature of human beings always triggers upon exposure to new ideas
or products, which is the exact experience with the latest technology and thus making it gain
a very high level of reliance. Modern technology has several positive effects that increase the
reliance levels from the people adopting the system. Advanced technology has improved the
communication system in several ways, among them is attaining a faster and more efficient
information transfer, thus attracting more people to use the channel. The communication
channel was initially very tiresome and inefficient as compared to the resulting modern
technology system. When the advanced technology came with the upgrade and better version,
the consumers of the services had no choice but to embrace the new improvement.
The other benefit that has come due to the reliance on this particular technology is in
the education sector. Communication by definition is primarily the passing of information
from one person who is the source, to another that is the receiver with the aim of getting
feedback. The concept holds in various educational institutions where there is message
delivery to the respective students by the instructor, and then the input comes when the
students perform accordingly in their various examinations or assignments. Through
technology, the world has quickly become a global community or village where people learn
multiple languages or take their courses online at their domestic countries. In the end it has
made it possible to qualify for employment in other countries across the world.
Modern technology has succeeded in ensuring that the academic information is passed
effectively from the instructors to the students through the introduction of the online
Exam # 500507
education approach. It is this system of education that resulted from the modern technology
and its implication in communication does not necessarily need the students to converge at
one single place to get the information. The instructors can pass across resource materials
through media such as email, dashboard or any other tool, and it gets to the students. There is
some attraction that has come with the approach, and the people have greatly benefited from
relying on technology.
There are also some elements of entertainment packaging the modern technology that
also work pretty well and are quite attractive to various people. In the previous years there
were minimal ways for entertainment, for example, if it were a program on the television it
would last for a brief time, and if one is busy somewhere, he or she will miss it all. The
modern technology has changed this since one can actually save whatever has happened in
the system and then watch later when there is time (Newton et al., Pg 23). The internet also
makes the process much simpler since one can easily access news that they were was not in a
position to follow maybe due to prevailing commitments and responsibilities when the
information came.
In the same entertainment sector, modern technology has also seen the introduction of
new and more advanced equipment, for instance the launch of smart and digital LCD
televisions that produce better quality pictures as compared to the initial analogue
counterparts. Entertainment also fall under communication in that some information has to be
transferred from the entertainment source, be it music or television, which has to get to the
targeted audience to attain the outlined objectives.
There has been some improvement in the health industry as a result of the efficiency
in the transfer of information due to the introduction of modern technology in
communication. Majority of health centers, which are the hospitals and dispensaries, have
Exam # 500507
implemented the use of modern equipment in their various operations. Current
communication technology has well made it quite easy for the transfer of crucial health
information that may be needed urgently to save a life. The achievement has been via modern
electronic tools that have all the patients’ report and history while screening the spread of a
disease within the human system with fractions of a second. Again various health facilities
have modern tools coordinated with the government bodies to inform of looming health
outbreaks, therefore, enhancing the mitigation process.
Despite the many benefits and the numerous advantages displayed, there are some
claims of negative impacts resulting from relying on modern technology. The first one is the
quick spread of inappropriate information through the social media platform and other media
of communication (Crowley, David, and Heyer Pg 16). Technology has made it easy to
upload and spread information, as videos or in other forms, to various media such as
YouTube, Facebook, Whatsup, and Instagram among others on the internet. In as much as
this is important by making it easy to reach a large audience when the information is
misleading or viral, it can cause a lot of harm (Brown, John Seely, and Paul Duguid, pg. 14).
Another problem is the over-reliance on the use of modern technological resulting in
an addiction syndrome in most teenagers and some adults. Majority of the youths have
become addicted to social media thus making it difficult for them to concentrate on other
vital issues such as their jobs and academics. There is so much communication going on in
the social media platform that the youths have interest in, and they keep following; many are
so much obsessed with Facebook, Twitter, Skype, and Instagram among others while
neglecting other vital responsibilities.
There are also claims concerning financial factors to have negative implications from
modern technology used in communication. It is the cost of the equipment employed in
Exam # 500507
facilitating the communication process that seems high since at times one needs to acquire the
same. In as much as the cost factors are not very pleasing, one has to purchase this equipment
to remain updated with the trends. These costs have affected individuals by increasing their
spending on technology. There is also the training expense usually included in the
technology. The modern technology is sometimes quite complicated and to understand how
to operate the equipment, companies and individuals spend a lot of money training their
people on the usage and management of the same.
The other limitation that the modern technology in communication has brought is the
insecurity of the information that passes through the channels. Advanced technology has
brought this criterion of preserving personal data in one system. The approach is perilous
because in case of an attack there is so much at risk of destruction or getting into the wrong
hands (Newton et al., Pg. 6). An example is the growing cyber-attack instances (Haff, and
Peter, pg. 12). The risk of exposing confidential information makes it essential for
organizations to put up some substantial amount of money to set up security systems to
ensure safety.
The over-reliance in modern technology also prompts an adverse implication on the
human lifestyle. Due to the ease of transferring information, the general lifestyle significantly
changes since there is no need for one to cover long distances to pass information hence the
exposure to a higher risk of disease invasions (Katz, James pg 18). There is no longer need to
rely on the old approaches of passing information instead they have just adjusted to
transferring the same at the comfort of wherever they are using the new equipment.
It is indeed true that modern technology has a vast impact on the life of every person,
thus influencing various sectors of the economy. By comparing the discussed cost-benefit
analysis of advanced technology while considering the current developments, it remains a
Exam # 500507
vital tool in human life. One can mention education, employment, health, economic growth
amidst other things that remain fundamental. The wave of technology cost has been a debate,
but upon selecting an efficient and appropriate durable means, the short term expenses shall
be overruled since the long-term gains are far much more significant. The issue of cyber
security and bullying is easily solved using modern technology unlike in the past. Therefore,
upon optimal application, advanced technology is the best tool that every household,
organization, and country needs to enhance daily operations. In communication, the health
sector and the government are huge beneficiaries when it comes to mitigating a predicated
condition.
Additionally, the government also stands an added advantage of guarding the national
borders when a terror alarm rings. The benefits have made modern technology quite attractive
for the people who have increased reliance on it. The changes are impressive since they carry
huge benefits that motivate the people to rely more on technology. It is, therefore, critical for
the people to have significant knowledge of both sides of modern technology so that they can
be well informed when putting them into practice.
Work Cited
Brown, John Seely, and Paul Duguid. The Social Life of Information: Updated, with a New
Preface. Harvard Business Review Press, 2017.
Crowley, David, and Paul Heyer. Communication in history: Technology, culture, society.
Routledge, 2015.
Exam # 500507
Haff, Peter K. "Technology as a geological phenomenon: implications for human wellbeing." Geological Society, London, Special Publications 395.1 (2014): 301-309.
Katz, James E. Machines that become us: The social context of personal communication
technology. Routledge, 2017.
Long, Richard J. New office information technology: Human and managerial implications.
Routledge, 2018.
Newton, Victoria, Alexander Greenberg, and Judi See. "Project Management Implications
and Implementation Roadmap of Human Readiness Levels." International Conference
on HCI in Business, Government, and Organizations. Springer, Cham, 2017.
Rasmussen, Terje. Social theory and communication technology. Routledge, 2018.