Joseph L. Wills
ENG. – 240
23 December 2018
To: Darrin Knapke (Assistant Superintendent)
From: Joseph L. Wills
The things that we cherish and keep near and dear in our lives is our
children. Parents are always doing or saying things in order to keep their children safe, as
a parent you would risk everything to protect your child. The lessons we try to teach them
to prepare themselves for happiness and security in life are important, so why is it we are
having so much of a hard time keeping our children safe in schools today? The purpose
of sending our children to a public school is to get them well rounded and embrace the
community setting we as a society see fit, let us work at providing them with the sense of
safety that should be provided for them from us as that of the society we want to
implement on them.
The evidence is clear that violence is present in our schools with 18,300 reported
incidents of threats or attack with a weapon during the 2015-16 school year from all
public schools (2017). Technology is working for some school districts that have budgets
that can afford these high-tech capabilities. They have proven to be effective from
preventing recorded incidents like that of the Shawnee Mission School District in Kansas.
One particular incident had a boy who had been threatening other students prior came to
the school one day and tried to get into a back door where security cameras identified
him. The authorities were contacted where they found the young man making his back
his house where he had weapons in his room. The high-tech capabilities are non the less
needed and should be emplaced in all schools. Time is of the essence when it comes to
reaction versus action.
I would like to have this opportunity to discuss the safety measurements takin that
protect our children from hostile activity or any physical or emotional harm that may be
emerging in our schools. As a parent of two elementary school aged children I think
about my children’s safety while attending the local public school in my town. I am as
concerned for any school or child’s safety. Today we are seeing too many incidents of
children being murdered in cold blood. Are these incidents all preventable? The answer is
unknown, but the step to prevent it from happening as easy is available. I propose that we
take immediate action in securing our schools by means of providing healthy minded and
physically capable men and woman armed and trained in defending people and property.
The availability of these candidates is among us and willing to put their lives on the line
to protect our children. I would like to suggest Military or Law enforcement trained
personal. The protection these young men and woman have given us says they were and
still are capable of taking on immeasurable task to accomplish their duties.
Technology is definitely an advantage to have but we should be providing
protection to our most valuable possessions the immediate reaction to a violent action. I
feel that armed personal is required to defend our children during hostile acts. The
school’s system already has reaction to an active shooter which is a valuable measure in
its self but to have personal who are at the scene and can immediately secure it and
prevent more devastation from occurring is immeasurable. Time to have someone on the
scene from an outside source could take longer than one could hope. That time waiting
for help could cost my child’s life.
The goal is to secure a safe and healthy environment for our children to enjoy
themselves and feel enthused about being at school. The protection is easy to provide,
and its available. The number one way we can tell if there is a weapon or a plot in school
is from another student who comes forward with information (2018). That may not
always be the case, human behavior is unpredictable. I feel it is the absolute best and least
we can do to for our children and those in the school that we value them. My question is
why these measures aren’t takin and without them how we prevent a huge loss for
family’s who have to suffer asking why something wasn’t there done to prevent this.
I will leave you with this to think about as the provider and persons responsible,
that God forbidding you won’t have to ask yourselves the same question.
Joseph L. Wills
Melissa Diliberti, Michael Jackson & Jana Kemp. July 2017. Crime, Violence,
Discipline, and Safety in U.S. Public Schools
Findings from the School Survey on Crime and Safety: 2015–16.
Kenneth Trump. 2018. School Safety Debate Lacks Focus on What's Best For
Kids, Expert Says. Retrieved from:
Jon Schuppe. May 20, 2018. Schools are spending billions on high-tech security.
But are students any safer? Retrieved from: https://www.nbcnews.com/news/usnews/schools-are-spending-billions-high-tech-security-are-students-any-n875611
ENG-240 Peer Review Worksheet: Proposal Essay
Part of your responsibility as a student in this course is to provide quality feedback to your peers
that will help them to improve their writing skills and help you improve your professional
proofreading and editing skills. This worksheet will assist you in providing that feedback.
Name of the draft’s author:
Name of the peer reviewer:
After reading through the draft one time, write a summary (3-5 sentences) of the paper that
includes your assessment of how well the essay meets the assignment requirements as
specified in the syllabus and the rubric.
Now conduct a second, closer reading of the draft. Imagine you have been hired by the writer to
professionally proofread and edit of the proposal.
Answer each of the following questions. Positive answers will give you specific elements of the
draft to praise; negative answers will indicate areas in need of improvement and revision. Please
be sure to indicate at least three positive aspects of the draft and at least three areas for
improvement in reply to the questions at the bottom of this worksheet.
You will be graded on how well you evaluate, proofread, and edit the draft proposal as well as
how well you provide constructive feedback to the writer. This assignment uses a rubric. Please review
the rubric prior to beginning the assignment to become familiar with the expectations for successful completion.
Proposal Content and Ideas
How effectively does the thesis statement identify the main points that the writer would
like to make in this proposal?
How successfully does the paper focus on presenting a well-reasoned proposal?
How is evidence used to justify ideas and enrich the essay?
Does the proposal meet professional workplace standards as outlined in the text book?
How well does the proposal use professional language?
Does the content of the proposal clearly state the proposed solution? Explain your
What is the one thing the writer could do to create the most significant improvement in
the content of their draft?
How effectively does the introduction engage the reader while providing an overview of
Please identify the writer’s thesis and quote it in the box below.
How effectively do the paragraphs develop the topic sentence and advance the essay’s
How effectively does the conclusion provide a strong, satisfying ending, not a mere
summary of the essay?
How closely does the paper follow GCU formatting style? Is it double-spaced in 12 pt.
Times New Roman font? Does it have 1" margins? Does it have a proper heading (with
student’s name, date, course, and instructor’s name)? Explain
Are all information, quotations, and borrowed ideas cited in parenthetical GCU format? If
not, please provide an example from the proposal.
Are all sources listed on the references page in GCU format? If not, please provide an
example from the proposal.
Is the required minimum number of sources listed, and are all sources appropriate to
support the content of the proposal? If not, make suggestions where additional sources
could be used.
Language Use and Style
Are the voice and tone of the essay effective in characterizing ideas and creating the
appropriate mood? If “No,” please provide examples of ineffective or inappropriate
voice and tone.
How effectively does the paper incorporate a variety of sentence structures that
strengthen the ideas, create vitality, and avoid choppiness in the writing? Provide
examples of sentences that could be improved if applicable.
How would you assess the writer’s diction (i.e., word choice)? Does the writer use active
verbs, concrete nouns, and precise words? Make suggestions of areas for improvement if
Grammar and Mechanics
Does the writer use proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling? If “No,” please provide
examples of errors in need of correction.
Is the writing clear and comprehensible throughout the draft? If “No,” please provide
examples in need of improvement.
Three things that I liked about the draft are:
Three things that could be improved are:
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