A. Dominant Impression: What
is the feeling or mood you are trying to create in your work? What
feeling do you want the audience, your readers, to feel as they are
reading your work? I would urge you to be more specific than "happy,
sad, or excited"--those aren't very specific feelings. In Journal entry
4A, briefly describe that dominant impression. (Keep this dominant
impression in mind; you’ll want to match this dominant impression to the
task required for the rest of this journal entry.)
Here is a rough draft of my writing. I need help with a dominant impression. Thanks.
It was a cold dark morning as we headed up to Unit 45 for my
big elk hunt. I was so excited since I
had never drawn a tag before. We were
only about 20 minutes into our drive when I realized that my ex-husband had
been drinking since we started driving. I told him to pull over so that I could drive
and he refused and before I knew it we had run into another vehicle. I remember vividly seeing our car move into the
oncoming traffic. He hit there rear axle and took the whole rear off. I remember looking through the front
windshield thinking this was the last time I would ever look through a front
windshield. My life flashed before my
eyes. All I could think about were my
children, my daughter who was 8 months old at the time and my unborn child in
my tummy. We finally stopped rolling and
I could not get out of the truck the doors were probably locked and I was in
such shock that I could not unlock them.
Thank god the window was broken and so I crawled through putting a gash
in my arm from the broken glass. Our
friend could not get out of the back seat and all I could hear in the distance
was someone screaming for help, but still could not see since it was still
early morning about 5:45 am. We needed
to be up there early so that we could get a good lookout spot for an elk. I was ready to shoot this elk with my 7mm-08,
which was ultimately broken over his back.
I just remember the air being crisp and cold. It felt like an eternity waiting for the
ambulance to get to the site of the accident.
There were 3 of us needing to be transported by ambulance so they had to
call the next town over to come pick the last two of us up. My ex-husband was taken in the first one
since he had been ejected through the front windshield and had an extensive
head injury and come to find out later a broken collar bone. We got to the hospital and the only injury
that I had ultimately was my gash on my arm.
They wanted to take x-rays of me to make sure nothing was broken and I
said no since I was pregnant. They did
scan my brain (CT scan), and everything looked normal. I just remember the look on my parents face
when they got to the hospital as if they were looking at a ghost they could
have lost me. I just started crying when
I got to hold my 8 month old daughter.
She could have lost her mother that day.