TEACHER AND PEER REVIEEW FEEDBACK TEACHERS COMMENTS: Week 7 Assignment 4 - Submit Here Great job providing a lot of revisions here for your persuasive paper. The thesis was informative and persuasive, and the paper had a lot of good specifics backing up the main claims. Good job organizing the paper clearly as well. PEER REVIEW COMMENTS: Appendix A: Peer Review Feedback Form 2 Reviewer’s Name: Amanda Carter_ Date: November 29, 2015__ Writer’s Assigned #: _ Course:__ENG215046__ Section:__ Assignment 4: Persuasive Paper Part 2: Solution and Advantages Peer reviews should provide feedback to a peer on the criteria expected in the paper. Follow these instructions: 1) Receive a classmate’s paper from your professor (in class if on-ground; by e-mail if online). 2) Copy the Peer Review Feedback Form from the Appendix. 3) Comment on all criteria, noting strengths and / or areas for improvement on the feedback form. 4) Provide completed Peer Review Feedback Form and classmate’s paper to your professor. Note: On-ground students should submit the feedback form and paper to the professor during the class meeting in which the paper is reviewed; online students should submit the feedback form and paper to the professor via the Assignment Tab in the course shell. Criteria + Strengths Comments < Areas for Improvement Part 1 1. Revise, using feedback from the professor and classmates, your Persuasive Paper Part I - A Problem Exists. I understand what the issue is you are writing about Part 2 2. Included a defensible, relevant thesis statement clearly in the first paragraph. 3. Explain a detailed, viable solution that supports your thesis. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs. Not enough information even though you did clearly define solutions However, I feel the thesis statement may not be clear enough to other readers Write more to back up your thesis statement 4. State, explain, and support the first advantage (economic, social, political, environmental, social, equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your solution. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs. 5. State, explain, and support the second advantage (economic, social, political, environmental, social, equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your solution. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs. 6. State, explain, and support the third (and fourth if desired) advantage (economic, social, political, environment, social, equitable, ethical/moral, etc.) to your solution. This should be one or two (1-2) paragraphs. 7. Use effective transitional words, phrases, and sentences. You did explain and support the first advantage Could have been more detailed You did explain and support the second advantage Could have been more detailed You did explain and support the third advantage Could have been detailed 8. Provide a concluding paragraph /transitional paragraph that summarizes the proposed solution and its advantages. 9. Develop a coherently structured paper with an introduction, body, and conclusion. There was a conclusion 10. Use one or more rhetorical strategies (ethos, logos, pathos) to explain advantages. 11. Support advantage claims with at least three (3) a d d i t i o n a l quality relevant references. Use at least six (6) total for Parts 1 & 2. 12. Other Intro, body and conclusion present Did not see any specific strategies in the paper Good use of relevant references. Use more transitional words and key phrases to keep your audience on the verge of reading and interested in the topic I felt the conclusion was not long enough and did not encompass the entire paper Running head: RESEARCH TOPICS 1 Research Topics Ericia M. Staton Professor Neil Conway ENG215 Research & Writing October 11, 2015 RESEARCH TOPICS 2 Topic 1: Should regulations be changed regarding genetically altering plants and/or animals The reason for selecting this topic is to gain a better understanding of genetically modified foods and if they are recommendable for our health. This item is for those people who are fond of taking genetically modified foods without knowing if they are safe for their health. Genetically engineering refers to the altering of the genes of the DNA of a living thing. Genetically engineering that is also known as biotechnology and involves altering the nature and traits of the living thing that would otherwise not be possible through natural means. Some effects of genetically engineered foods are known, but others have not yet been disclosed. The effects that have been disclosed are short term effect and some physical impact, but the long terms effects are unknown still. One of the effects is that this can introduce a new allergy and may cause some people to develop some allergies. They could also cause bacteria in our guts to pick up antibiotic resilience genes that are contained in these GM foods. Regulations are there concerning these foods and in my opinion they should be made stricter to moderate the rate at which this is done. References LiangGenetically modified crops : their development, uses, and risks. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://searchworks.stanford.edu/view/5749019, G. H., & Skinner, D. Z. (2004). New York: Food Products Press. RESEARCH TOPICS 3 Mandel, G. N. (2003). Gaps, Inexperience, Inconsistencies, and Overlaps: Crisis in ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://scholarship.law.wm.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1341&context=wmlrWm. & Mary L. Rev., 45, 2167. Topic 2: Should taxes on alcohol and tobacco be increased to help pay for rising medical costs? This topic was meant to gain knowledge on the parties that recommend the taxes imposed on alcohol and tobacco to be increased and the reasons for this recommendation. Meant for all the providers of healthcare services and the demanders and also the policy makers in the health care sector. The WHO is one organization that came up and recommended the governments to increase taxes on tobacco and alcohol to assist in raising funds to pay for healthcare services that are not yet available to many people. Because of the increasing health care costs due to the toughening economic times and the introduction of new expensive treatments. Reference Sabet-Sharghi, K. A. (2013). Reefer Sanity: Seven great myths about marijuana. New York, NY: Beaufort Books. (2010). Effects of alcohol tax and price policies Wagenaar Publications » Health Outcomes & Policy » College ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://health-outcomes-policy.ufl.edu/facultydirectory/wagenaar-alexander-c/wagWagenaar Publications » Health Outcomes & Policy » College ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://health-outcomes-policy.ufl.edu/faculty-directory/wagenaar-alexander-c/wagon RESEARCH TOPICS 4 morbidity and mortality: a systematic review. American Journal of Public Health, 100(11), 2270-2278. Topic 3: Should regulations regarding the use of cell phones while driving be standardized? This problem determines the existing policies concerning usage of mobile phones while driving. This is towards the people who are fond of doing this to make them aware of the regulations that prohibit ties and the dangers of the same. There has been a growing dependency on the usage of cell phones in thus. However, the policies that govern the use of cell phones while driving should be standardized. Personally, I think that the safety of people should be prioritized more compared to importance gained from using cell phones while driving. Using cell phone is a habit many people have been developing and may impair the driver’s concentration posing danger t others while on the road and even to one’s life. Regulations should, therefore, be formulated to prohibit and reduce this behavior and also create awareness of the dangers of driving and using a cell phone at the same time. References Strayer, D. L., Drews, F. A., & Johnston, W. A. (2003). Could the Dangers of Driving and Using a Cell Phone Be a ... (n.d.). Retrieved from http://tsminteractive.com/dangers-driving-cell-phonehealth-check/ Journal of Experimental Psychology: Applied, 9(1), 23. RESEARCH TOPICS (2004). Risk perceptions of mobile phoneDr Mathew White - Plymouth University. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.plymouth.ac.uk/staff/mathew-white use while driving. Risk Analysis, 24(2), 323-334. 5 Running head: GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS Genetically Modified Foods Ericia Staton Professor Neil Conway ENG215 Research & Writing October 25, 2015 1 GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 2 Topic of discussion The topic that I chose to work on is the topic regarding genetically modified foods that are those foods that is created through artificial modification by different genes from different types of plans that are food crops of the same kind being introduced to each other and with this interaction a new kind of plant is derived. Despite the fact that there are many benefits from genetically modified foods that is received, there are other adverse effects such as deaths and allergic complications from the toxin present in these foods. And that’s the main reason I would emphasize on the changes to me made concerning genetically modified foods so that the adverse effects can be controlled, and harmful products does not get released on the market. Defensible thesis statement The reasons behind the selection are the facts associated with these foods with allergic complications and they may have adverse effects on the human health, and the regulations should be changed to ensure that the adverse effects are limited, and no food that has adverse effects is released to the market for sale. Although the foods might be benefiting to the consumer there are cases where these foods have become hazardous and resulted in death for those who have consumed them. Therefore before any genetically modified food product can be released on the market, it should be subjected to testing and assessment to ensure that it is fit for consumption and this will be made possible by changes in the regulation process (www.nbcnews.com). GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 3 Characteristics of the audience The people to whom this proposal is directed to should be open and willing to share relevant ideas and take into account the information that will be offered concerning the change in these regulations. This characteristic is important in decision making and from this the best decisions concerning the rules will be made and the problems that have been experienced in the past concerning GMO will be handled. The audience should also have the authority to implement the decisions made so that the proposal can be actually implemented and the relative changes made. The audience should also be well equipped regarding information regarding genetically modified foods in the past, and this information will act as evidence to support this proposal (Baker, G. A., & Burnham, 2001). Scope statement A scope statement is a statement that justifies the proposal or the relevant project and through it one can give reasons as to why the project should be implemented. The project has various characteristics in that it is not costly, has benefits, has the intended targets and will be utilized publically to benefit many in that it is not helping at an individual level hence it’s a good project. The project does not require much work since it’s not complex hence it is easily acceptable for implementation, and there are not many conditions that have to be met so as to implement this project making the project acceptable (www.agbioforum.org). Questions to be asked GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 4 The issues to be asked would be the methods that will be used to determine the credibility of the statements made by these foods. Evaluations and assessments can be conducted on such foods and this is a more encouraging and more appealing examination that will help in exposing the toxic products that are present in such foods as the foods have been engineered in a way that they will fight diseases and the metabolism used in fighting diseases contain harmful genes that can harm human beings. Methods of research Successful projects require much attention and expertise since any mistake that can be made during planning and implementation stages can lead to the overall failure of the project hence the need for proper and efficient research methods. The best research methods that you have to use in implementing a project should be methods that focus on numbers and theory and in any successful project the method that should be used in this project is the qualitative research method that involves fishing out for quality and relevant information that will be used in determining the outcomes of the project. GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 5 References Baker, G. A., & Burnham, T. A. (2001). Consumer response to genetically modified foods: a Market segment analysis and implications for producers and policy makers. Journal of Agricultural and Resource Economics, 387-403. http://www.agbioforum.org/v5n3/v5n3a06-phillips.htm http://www.nbcnews.com/id/37576031/ns/business-us_business/t/marketing-push-targets bioengineered-food/ Running head: GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS Genetically Modified Foods Ericia Staton Professor Neil Conway ENG215 Research & Writing November 08, 2015 1 GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 2 Introduction Genetically modified foods have good benefits and at the same time they have disadvantages that have resulted in health problems and deaths in the victims who consume these products. Each and every day the products get into our market, and we might buy them without our knowledge and end up ill and in some cases death could be the result. Therefore, it would be the right choice to ensure that we have not allowed such harmful products in our society. If we fail to take of this problem when it’s still early, it might not end up well in future when the foods consumed have introduced bad genes in our bodies. It is, therefore, the high time actions that should be taken to save our families from some of the harmful products sold in our markets. History and current status of genetically modified foods problems There have been various problems related to genetically modified foods where these foods have continued to compromise the health of many people due to the many chemicals introduced during the engineering process (Schuck, 2007). The problems that have been present in the recent past concerning these foods started shortly after the introduction back in the late 1990s, and many health organization have stated that they are not fit for consumption and have caused allergies that might affect a person for a very long time. From the time that these foods are introduced, there has been an increase in allergic complications. Since the seeds of these plants are transported through wind pollination, and they have affected many plants that were originally natural with no modification and, as a result, these GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 3 foods that are widely spread in our society are being consumed leading to many negative results in our bodies and the environment. The problems are long terms and should be dealt with in the early stages to avoid further negative consequences. Currently, these foods have been developed in each and every continent and proven by doctors and lab technicians that these foods increase the likelihood of getting cancer. Problems associated with genetically modified foods The first problem that is a social and ethical problems dealing with these foods is that they are not a hundred percent healthy and have long-term health effects in human beings. The studies that have been conducted using animals show that the foods have resulted in damages in the internal organs and in the case of a human being this damage could be fatal meaning it would eventually lead to death (Chʻin, 2005). The immunity of a person can be compromised when the foods are introduced in the body system thereby making the victim vulnerable to various diseases due to the weak immune system. The foods are said to be leaving harmful materials within the body and with that materials from the different chemicals used in engineering these foods, human beings get weak and will eventually start having complications that would have otherwise been avoided when one consumed natural foods (Doble, and Gummadi, 2007). The foods that are associated with some of the increasing cases of infertility where people lack children and their reproductive capabilities are compromised. As a result of the various genes that have been introduced in the body system through these foods leading to weak body systems which cannot support some of their functions. Genes are introduced into the body system can leave toxic material, such as the toxin that’s used in fighting insects and other pests. And example is given of a case where a pregnant woman and the baby she was carrying were GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 4 found to be having the harmful bacteria and toxic material in their blood and later in life such material could lead to complicated health issues. The other environment related the problem is that these foods increase the use of herbicides in our environment and with these products in our environment we are in a risky position because they produce toxic material that can be inhaled or even absorbed through our crops, and it will end up in our bodies. Our environment is the other issue is that we have. The genes introduced from different organisms have long-term side effects if not managed. We shall all become victims in future as the plants are still producing seeds that end up being passed on to other natural plants and foods crops and the pattern will develop all crops eventually will be genetically modified and all that we consume will be harmful to us. The environment through genetically modified foods is being polluted, and it has been noted that from the late 1990s there has been an increase in the use of pesticides with over three hundred and eighty million pounds of these chemicals being introduced into our environment. The third problem that we shall address is also the environmental problems is that the introduction of these foods into our environment will lead to the death of various organisms (Oyarzabal, and Backert, 2012). The chemicals produced as a protection mechanism kills birds and insect and in case they are carried by rain water and introduced into the water bodies they will end up killing and affecting the marine ecosystem. There has been a decrease in the number of butterflies as a result of this crops and in the United States it has been noted that some of the amphibians are being born with defects that were not common in the past. The other serious problem associated with these foods is that there are cases of organ damaging in the animals that disrupt the functioning of various body systems making the animals and other plans to fail in their reproductive duties. GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 5 It is, therefore, the high time that we advocated and took strict measures because the problems associated with these foods have gone beyond the benefits and with this disequilibrium we shall be on the losing end with our health being compromised and the environment and its components already polluted. Measures should be taken to stop genetic mutilation of various organisms for the results will not be favorable to anyone of us. References GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 6 Schuck, P. (2007). : Protein Interactions: Biophysical Approaches for the Study of… (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.springer.com/us/book/9780387359656 . New York: Springer. Chʻin, C. (2005). Trapping gene products: new tools for studying proteins. Doble, M., & Gummadi, S. (2007). Biochemical engineering. New Delhi: Prentice-Hall of India. Oyarzabal, O. A., & Backert, S. (2012). Microbial food safety: An introduction. New York: Springer. Running head: SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS Solutions to Genetically Modified Foods Ericia Staton Professor Neil Conway ENG 215 Research & Writing November 22, 2015 1 SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 2 Genetically engineering refers to the altering of the genes of the DNA of a living thing. Also referred to as biotechnology and involves altering the nature and traits of the living thing that would otherwise not be possible through natural (ENVR 2000 Blog Assignment | Just another WordPress.com weblog. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://envirojenna.wordpress.com/) means. There have been significant concerns about the rate at which people are turning to genetically engineered foods. Considering the health effects that these foods pose to the consumer, there are many concerns about the implications of GM crops and the main concern is how the ecological systems introduced are posing dangers and have severe side effects. There is a tremendous need to turn to sustainable ways of farming and producing food as this assists in keeping the ecosystems in balance, fosters respect for the wildlife, preserves soil among other natural resources and reduces greenhouse gas emissions. Also, turning to organic foods will also provide high quality and healthy lives for the consumers. In the previous assignment, several effects of GM crops were mentioned and in this case, we need to determine the ideal alternatives or rather solutions to this problem of GM crops being unhealthy and affecting the environment. In this paper, we shall determine the most viable solution to curb the emanating effects of GM crops on people IRREDUCIBLE CONGRUENCES OF PRIME POWER DEGREE). (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.ams.org/tran/1971-153-00/S0002-9947-1971-0274420-9/S00029947-1971-02 (Hartmann, 2010). Organically produced foods known as superior especially in the nutritional benefits they provide to the consumer. They are known to produce beneficial nutrients such as antioxidants, SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 3 vitamins, enzymes, amino acids and minerals. On the other hand, research has it that the combination of different chemicals in the GM crops may enhance the harmful effects of these foods. According to experts in agriculture, this method of farming is proving to be unsustainable as is leading to the accumulation of complications and harmful effects of various natures. Using this method of agriculture is also being associated with a reduction in the yields as a result of soil degradation in the areas that this system is done Sustainable alternatives or solutions to this continuing problem have therefore been unleashed in various regions of the world. These viable options have continued to gain more support since the failures of the current industrial methods continue to manifest. People are now resulting in agro-ecology, local production, and consumption that is a step to move away from the damaging and harmful methods of food production. Among the advantages of resulting to alternative farming methods include: increasing of ecological resilience and this pertain to the environment. The more so on volatile weather conditions. Agroecology can improve the adaptive capacity of agroecosystems, and this reduces the vulnerability or the risk of natural disasters and climate change and also emerging environmental and economic system stresses. There are some ways this is accomplished when using this method. This process fosters the taking advantage of solar radiation and uses photosynthesis to transform light into food calories. Encouraging bacteria living in symbiotic relationships with legumes to produce proteins through the means of nitrogen fixations, fostering his production of humus through spreading of organic matter on the fields, ensures sufficient plant coverage, and this protects the land surface from negative elements and preventing the propagation of pathogenic agents. SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 4 The next advantage is the ethical and moral consideration where agroecology also plays the role of improving the health and the nutrition of consumers. This is made possible by establishing a more diverse, nutritious and healthy diets which is ensured through the reduced usage of pesticide poisonings and pesticide-related diseases that consumers are likely to contracts from taking GM crops. Eating organic foods will save people from the effects o the residues of chemicals that often originate in the GM crops. Organic foods have the right combinations of nutrients that are essential in our bodies and hence turning to agroecology would only do us more good than bad (Erlick, 2013). The third advantage regards the economy where agroecology has been noted to improve economic stability. This would mean more diverse sources of income, spreading of labor needs and production over time that assists in the reduction of risks to price swings. Agroecology also leads to seed sovereignty. In other words, agroecology improves the seeds and leads to adaptation to the diversity of soils and climate conditions. This also leads to a diversity of crops and varieties. Production of GM crops, on the other hand, only serves the financial interest of the firms involved in the production of the same. The seeds are selected patents and intellectual property rights and hey also require vast amounts of chemicals to attain high yields. This lead to farmer dependency that is a bad thing for the economy. Agroecology is solving this problem through inducing farmers to turn o breeding their seeds and turning to farm grown seeds. This aspect is beneficial in the sense that it conserves many varieties and improves seed diversity as well. Turning to agroecology will serve as an appropriate solution to the harmful effects of genetically modified foods. People should learn more about the effects and dangers of GM crops and organizations are also taking steps to stop and turn to better agricultural and food production SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 5 practices. Industrial agriculture was offered without the necessary investigation of how it can affect the environment and also the health of consumers. Now that it is recognized of how it can be unsustainable and on the harmful effects of these foods. It is upon people to turn to sustainable alternatives such as agroecology. And this will assist us in many ways such as mitigating the impact of climate change through the reduction of greenhouse gas emissions. Improving the quality of life rough improving health and nutrition and conserving biodiversity and natural resources and leading to economic stability (Green Roofs: Reducing Energy Use and Elevating Quality of (n.d.). Retrieved from http://www.high-profile.com/green-roofs-reducingenergy-use-and-elevating-qualit) SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 6 References Erlick, N. (2013). Germline. New York: Tor. Hartmann, T. (2010). Unequal protection: How corporations became "people"--and you can fight back. San Francisco: Berrett-Koehler. Liang, G. H., & Skinner, D. Z. (2004). Genetically modified crops: their development, uses, and risks. (n.d.). Retrieved from http://searchworks.stanford.edu/view/5749019 New York: Food Products Press. SOLUTIONS TO GENETICALLY MODIFIED FOODS 7
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