Military Draft Midterm
You are a Washington, DC reporter for an international online news
service. Today at just before 12 noon the White House press office sent
you a text message advising of a major announcement. You and other
correspondents arrive at the White House press briefing room at about
5 pm. A press officer announces that the President will be addressing
the nation on network TV and then taking questions from reporters. A
few minutes later, President Donald Trump steps to the podium and
reads the statement that follows.
Good afternoon my fellow Americans.
For many years, we and our allies around the globe have been engaged
in a difficult war against the scourge of terrorism. Here at home and
abroad we have weathered terrorist attacks that have resulted in the
murder of thousands of our citizens. Although the courts have not
always cooperated with me, I have worked hard from allowing into the
country suspicious people from certain Muslim nations.
I took office and found we as a nation were not doing nearly enough to
stop Islamic terrorists from harming the good American people. Today,
the situation is much better. ISIS no longer holds any territory, for
instance.
As you well know, we have not spared efforts or resources in this
struggle against those who would harm us and our valued allies. We
have been able to hit our enemy hard and often. High-value terrorists
have been successfully targeted. Against lots of opposition, I continue
to push for better security at our border with Mexico.
Still, we must acknowledge that global terrorism is far from vanquished.
In the last few years, we witnessed the dangerous rise of the Islamic
State of Iraq and Syria or ISIS.
This is a savage terrorist group that cynically garbs itself in the trappings
of Islam. These terrorists have no legitimate ties to Islam. Everywhere
they have managed to wrest control of territory, people have been
brutalized, terrorized and even enslaved.
As I said, we have managed to take back the territory that ISIS once
held. Still, it represents a grave threat to the legitimate governments of
the Middle East and the democratic aspirations of many millions in the
region. There are other terrorist groups scattered around the globe.
These brutal thugs also represent an intolerable menace to Americans
here and abroad.
In response, we and our allies have launched an armed response that
has emphasized vigorous and sustained aerial assaults.
Russia has been a particularly valuable ally in the fight. We expect to
work even more closely with President Putin in wiping out the
terrorists.
Again, our armed attacks have had an effect. Yet, it has become clear
that these actions are not enough to halt ISIS. Indeed, having suffered
battlefield setbacks, these terrorists have launched a series of horrific
attacks on civilians in Europe and Turkey and in other nations. We don’t
have to live in fear of these cowards, but surely we must do more to
destroy them.
I have seen to it that American military spending, which was cut under
Obama, is now at adequate levels. The 2019 defense budget is $716
billion.
So, after long and careful consultation with my closest advisers, I have
come to the decision that we must commit substantial numbers of
ground troops.
Putting boots on the ground is a risky proposition. It means we will be
very deeply involved in the conflict. I had questioned the wisdom of
doing this to put it simply, I was wrong to believe this war could be won
with just the commitment of air power.
At the same time, I have decided that given our present troop strength
and the challenge we face, it is necessary to enact military conscription,
which most of us know as the draft.
Let me be clear: I do not have the authority to enact compulsory
military service. Both houses of Congress must first pass legislation,
which I would then sign.
Let me be equally clear that for many years an all-volunteer military has
more than adequately served our national and global defense needs.
But times have changed.
There is no escaping the fact that we quickly must increase our military
strength. As our enemies fighting forces expand, we would be
irresponsible if we did not follow suit.
I have already consulted with Congressional leaders, and they are ready
to push for legislation, which I will sign without delay. It is heartening
to see us push aside partisan differences in the interest of national
security.
Honestly, I had expected the Democrats to be an obstacle. Generally,
they don’t want a strong America. But, hey, they surprised me this
time.
My full expectation is that some three months from today we will
begin a lottery style draft process.
Once legislation is enacted, all
Americans between the ages of 18 and 25 will be eligible for
compulsory service.
I will ask Congress to support my decision to include women
in providing service to our country.
The lottery will involve the random selection of birthdates for all 365
days of the year. Those whose birthdates are selected first will also
be the first drafted. Some Americans will be either permanently or
temporarily exempted from service.
Now, I’m not naïve enough to believe that this will be popular with
all Americans. Historically, there has always been some opposition
to compulsory military enlistment.
I expect some critics will bring up the fact that I was medically unfit
for service during Vietnam. I had bone spurs in my heel. Those with
medical problems, of course, would be exempt.
One of the things we don’t talk about is that less advantaged young
people have been carrying most of the load in defending our nation.
This has long troubled me, and I’m sure many of you listening tonight
would agree this is inherently unjust. We all have a duty to see that
our precious homeland is staunchly defended.
As we all know, the United States continues to endure an immigration
crisis.
This is a situation that has been greatly worsened by Mexico’s
unwillingness and limited ability to patrol its border with Guatemala.
Several weeks ago, officials of my government got the Mexicans to do
a better job of securing their southern border.
But, the Mexicans have not done a very good job. We are still being
flooded with Central Americans claiming political asylum.
I intend to get our border under control and secure. This is something
the American people want.
As a result, Mexican President Andres Manuel Lopez Obrador and I
have agreed to deploy 2,500 American troops to the MexicoGuatemala border.
They will get the job done by keeping out all the thousands of Central
Americans. You know, they have played us for fools, the Central
Americans have. They are not political refugees. Instead, they just
want to get into the U.S ahead of the many legitimate refugees.
These troops will be deployed starting in two weeks. I know this will
put an end to the scam Central Americans have been running.
*The President has finished reading his statement and now takes
questions from reporters in a press conference. Be sure to
distinguish when possible between what Trump said in his
statement and in response to a question.
Q: How long will this draft last and how many Americans will be
called up?
A: We don’t have an endpoint defined yet. I can tell you that I would
like to see at least 150,000 men and women inducted into the
Armed Forces.
Q: Where will they be deployed?
A: There are some key hotspots—Yemen, Libya, Saudi Arabia, Iraq
and along the Syrian border—that require our intervention. We will
be talking with our regional allies about other places we can lend a
hand. It’s important to emphasize that groups such as ISIS still mean
to destroy us and other Middle East governments. They are a potent
enemy that requires an even more potent response.
Q: How do you reconcile the fact that the United States has been
engaged in large scale troop withdrawals with this sudden
reversal?
A: Well, as President you become aware of the need to respond to
changing conditions. It’s clear that the situation regarding terrorism is
not the same as it was two or three years ago. We face a much more
threatening situation, and we need to respond appropriately.
Q: The Vietnam War draft nearly tore apart this country. Hundreds of
thousands of Americans actively resisted being drafted, and some
even fled the country. What happens if this same scenario plays out
this time?
A: We all understand that the Vietnam War was unpopular because it
just wasn’t clear what crucial national security matters were at stake. I
remember thinking that myself at the time. But all these terrorists,
you’d have to be a fool to not see that they want to destroy us. We
are fighting to preserve our way of life. I know young Americans will
respond to the call to defend our great nation.
If, however, those qualified to serve to take it upon themselves to
ignore the law, they will face lots of legal sanctions, including
prison time and substantial fines.
Mandatory military service is going to be the law of the land. Make no
mistake. Naturally, every American has the right to peaceful dissent,
and this case is no different.
Keep in mind, too, that we have the Selective Service System that
requires all men here legally to register within 30 days of their
18th birthday.
Q: Why are you including women in the draft, and what will their
role be?
A: Women should be full members of our society. I know that is often
not true. But they ought not to be singled out for discrimination or
special treatment. I envision they will take on full combat roles.
Q: You have ordered a troop withdrawal from Afghanistan. Will you be
reversing that decision now.
A: Well, yeah. I talked to my generals, and they convinced me that now
is not the time to take troops out of Afghanistan. The Taliban, we’ve
been negotiating them. But, you know, we need to negotiate from a
position of strength, so we’ll be deploying troops there.
Q: You are launching this draft effort right in the middle of a busy
legislative time, with many of your own initiatives being debated. Is it
realistic to think that Congress will focus on getting the legislation
passed?
A: I’m not naïve about the challenges the timing presents. To repeat, I
have solid assurances that Congress will put to one side our partisan
differences in the vital interests of America.
Q: We have had military drafts only in times of full-scale war. Do you
mean to convey we are in a major war?
A: Yes, that is a large part of what this is about. We are fighting for our
way of life and the peace and stability of our allies. Plainly, it is not
possible to have a formal declaration of war. We are not dealing with
a nation.
Q: What about America’s allies? Are they going to be stepping up their
response?
A: Let me be candid. I have been disappointed at the timidity some
of our friends have shown in the face of the growing terrorist threat.
We will continue our diplomatic efforts to gain more robust
supports.
Q: Which countries do you mean?
A: I don’t want to name names just now. You know I have told the
NATO nations I’m not satisfied they’ve carried their fair share of
the financial load. That’s no secret.
Q: What is the cost of all of this?
A: We don’t know yet. I can tell you that no price is too great to pay.
Let’s see what we need to do specifically, and we’ll find the money.
Let’s see what happens.
Q. Do you believe the United States is doing all it can to infiltrate
and disrupt ISIS?
A. Excellent question. What you suggest is part of an ongoing effort. In
time we will see the results of that effort.
Q. Mexico has a 500-mile border with Guatemala. It is a dangerous
region, filled by armed smugglers and gang members. Will our troops
be authorized to use lethal force?
A. You bet they will. The place is crawling with bad hombres. If they
make the foolish mistake of attacking our troops they will pay with
their lives.
Q. Won’t the deployment of U.S. forces on Mexican soil create an
anti-American backlash in Mexico?
A. I don’t care if it does. The Mexican president and I worked out a
deal. If it causes trouble in Mexico, that’s his problem.
Q. How long will American troops in Mexico?
A. For as long as it takes. There’s no end date.
Thank you very much. God Bless America.
In reviewing the information, determine what are the most
important facts and assertions. You will note many interesting
quotes.
By no means have all questions and doubts been addressed here.
Your job is to tell readers what is known at this time, and what is
not known. The question and answer segment, or press conference,
elicited some interesting comments.
What should your lead say? This is a major story with significant
historical meaning.
*Remember, the draft is not a done deal. Congress must enact the
enabling legislation. So, be sure your lead does not go beyond the
President announcing his intent to begin military conscription.
Be sure your story makes that clear. You should include his claim
that Congressional leaders support him. However, you must balance
that with what Pelosi said.
Also, take note of what the President said at the end regarding
a formal declaration of war.
Feel free to incorporate any information not contained
here. However, do no inject personal opinions.
In your guise as an online reporter, treat this as breaking news
that will be posted on your news site within the next 90 minutes.
A few minutes after the press conference, you receive an e-mail from
Democratic House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. It reads:
“Our party has always supported a robust response to global
terrorism. But to enact a military draft so hastily may not be the best
course.
We need to consider other options, such as enhancing military pay
which could attract more volunteers. I look forward to discussions
with Mr. Trump. I also am alarmed that the President intends to
send combat forces to Mexico. He has not consulted with Congress
about this. There must be a discussion before any decision is taken.”
Here is a link to a helpful site that provides background on the draft.
https://www.sss.gov/About/History-And-Records/Background-OfSelective-Service
**Write a news story of between 580 and 640 words. ***
This is an excellent example of news media writing. It is not quite 200 words, and yet the story
delivers the day’s events and some background.
Peshawar, Pakistan (CNN) [This is called the dateline. Despite the name,
nowadays there is no date, just the place where the story was reported and
written} -- At least 17 people were killed and more than 30 others wounded in an
explosion that ripped through a bus carrying government employees in northwest
Pakistan on Friday, authorities said.
This is a model lead. In 34 words it first conveys the most important news, that
people have been killed and injured. It gives readers a fairly specific number of
dead and wounded. Next, the lead describes the circumstances of the tragedy,
followed by the place and day. At the end, the information is attributed, letting
readers know the source of the information.
The blast destroyed the bus, police said. It was carrying at least 70 employees of
various departments of the secretariat of Peshawar, the capital of the volatile
province of Khyber Pakhtunkhwa.
Police think the explosion was caused by a remote-controlled device planted in a
tin can containing about 6 to 8 kilograms (13 to 18 pounds) of explosives, said
Nasir Durrani, inspector general of police in the province.
No group has so far claimed responsibility for the attack.
Note that the three paragraphs above provide less important news compared to
the lead. They also add details not contained in the lead
Hakim Khan, an eyewitness, said the explosion hurled people sitting on the bus's
roof out into fields by the side of the road.
Authorities said 34 people who were wounded in the blast are being treated at
nearby hospitals.
These four paragraphs offer still more detail about the bombing and a bit of
context at the end.
Sikander Khan Sherpao, senior minister of Khyber Pakhtunkhwa, suggested the
attack had been carried out by forces wanting to sabotage recent efforts by the
national government to pursue peace talks with the Pakistani Taliban.
Violence is frequent in Peshawar and the surrounding region
News Writing Tips
The building blocks
1. Accuracy
What you write can influence decisions, help form public opinions of people and contribute to
the general attitude of your readers.
With that power comes responsibility that can't be taken lightly.
Get a fact wrong, misspell a name or omit a vital piece of information and you not only can
distort the truth and misinform the public, but you also damage the credibility of your
organization. Without credibility, a news organization is finished. Guard it carefully.
2. Clarity
Media writing is not academic writing. Don't use big words and long sentences. More than
ever, readers are pressed for time. You have to give them the news quickly, concisely and
without a lot of extra words or information they don't need.
Every story competes for a reader's attention.
With every story you write, ask yourself: What is the news here? Why should my readers care?
What does this mean to them?
Your lead, and then the rest of your story, should spring from those questions.
Then, ask yourself, "What questions will the reader have that I need to answer?" Jot them
down, and be sure none are left unanswered.
Write short: short sentences, short paragraphs, short stories. Use simple language. Think hard
about every word you use. Is it necessary? Is there a clearer, concise way to say this?
Read your story aloud. It sounds dumb, but you'll spot places that don't sound right and might
trip up the reader.
3. Style
Good writers are artists. Good news writers are, too.
They can entertain, inspire, anger and educate. News stories don't always have to follow the
inverted pyramid format.
Sure, you'll still use it, particularly for important, breaking news on deadline. But look for
opportunities to veer from that format into something more interesting. Never forget, though,
that your No. 1 objective is to tell people what they need to know -- not to show them how
much of a literary artist you are.
The first five paragraphs:
All the work of producing a news story is futile if the story does not engage the reader
immediately.
Writing coaches have identified four key elements that should be present in the first five
paragraphs of any news story (not necessarily in any particular order). They are:
News
The newest information: the basic facts of who, what, when, where, why and how ... the most
relevant information.
Impact
What a situation means and who is affected. Tells readers what the news changes about their
lives and, maybe, what they should do.
Context
This is the general perspective that frames the background of the news. It addresses the
relationship of things around the news. Context helps readers understand whether something is
normal or surprising.
Emotion
The human dimension takes a story from abstract to reality. It offers personal elements that
help readers understand the story. This is not necessarily a quote, but it could be.
Leads
Before you write, know your point: What is this story about and why is it important?
Common problems in leads
•
Cluttered—too many ideas
•
Flabby. It says, "I don't know what this story is about."
•
Dull. Ho-hum. No tension. No energy that drives the writing forward.
Qualities of Effective Leads
•
Focus. Make a specific promise to the reader, and then deliver.
•
Context. Involve the reader. Show clear, immediate significance. Answer the question,
"Why should I read this story?"
•
Form. Implies a design, a plan, a structure, a pattern that will help the reader
understand the meaning.
•
Information. Whets readers’ appetite, promises delivery.
Ten guidelines to clearer writing
1. One idea per sentence.
No:
Columbine High School in Littleton, Colo., experienced the largest of recent high school
murder rampages last week, and DeKalb schools, along with police, are reacting to a rumor of
violence at DeKalb High School.
Yes:
School officials and police are reacting quickly to a rumored threat of violence at DeKalb
High School.
The response follows last week's high school massacre in Littleton, Colo.
2. Limit sentence length to 40 words. If you can't read a sentence aloud without a breath, it's
too long.
3. Use quotes in context. Often quotes need to be introduced or explained. Think of them as
supplemental information. Rarely do quotes alone suffice in explaining a story or even one
point in the story
4. Use strong verbs and an active voice.
No: The poem will be read by La Tourette.
Yes: La Tourette will read the poem.
5. Reduce difficult words to their simplest terms. Don't let bureaucrats dictate your word
choices.
No:
The search committee will be constructed in accordance with Article 8 of the University’s
constitution.
Yes:
The University’s constitution dictates the search committee's makeup.
6. Don't back into a sentence.
No:
The end of the academic year and the end of the legislative session were two reasons La
Tourette cited.
Yes:
La Tourette cited two reasons: the end of the academic year and the end of the legislative
session.
7. Don't use more than three numbers in any one sentence.
No:
Wednesday, the UCI baseball team's winless streak hit 22 as UCI (4-37-1) dropped a twin bill
to Miami (21-18-1), 8-2 and 10-5, at Oxford, Ohio.
Yes:
Oxford, UCI's baseball losing streak reached 22 as the Anteaters dropped a doubleheader
Wednesday to Miami, 8-2 and 10-5.
8. Use no more than three prepositional phrases per sentence.
No:
Students who will be graduating from UCI will be honored at a senior luncheon from 11 a.m.
to 2 p.m. Friday in the Regency Room of the Holmes Student Center.
Yes:
Friday's senior luncheon will honor students about to graduate. The event runs from 11 a.m. to
2 p.m. in the Holmes Student Center's Regency Room.
9. Choose the precise word.
No:
This will increase the number of participants from 55 students a week to 200 students a week,
and in that extra 145 students the age for attendance also will change. The present center is
only equipped to handle children ages 2-6, but the new center will have the capacity to serve
infants, too. (2 sentences, 53 words total)
Yes:
This will increase the center's weekly capacity, from 55 children to 200. And, while the current
center takes children ages 2-6, the new center will take infants, too. (2 sentences, 28 words
total)
10. KISS (keep it simple, stupid).
No: Biological sciences professor Karl Johnson passed away Tuesday at the age of 55, following
a long, courageous battle with cancer.
Yes: Biology professor Karl Johnson died of cancer Tuesday. He was 55.
Using quotes
The best quotes are short and bright. They surprise, shock or amuse. They reveal insights or
secrets. They prove points. They allow experts to give perspective, and real people to air
grievances.
Sins to avoid when quoting people
•
Stutter quotes: Saying the same thing twice.
Mayor Bessie Chronopoulous said Tuesday she will seek a second term.
I intend to run for a second term," Chronopoulous said.
•
Partial quotes: Often, it's less awkward just to paraphrase.
Weak: Smith said the money was "spent by me" in order to buy "better-looking plants for the
office."
Better: Smith said he spent the money on better-looking plants for the office.
•
Parenthetical info in quotes
WEAK: "We can't get (the concrete barrier) to stay in one place because (La Tourette) keeps
driving into it," Smith said.
BETTER: La Tourette's driving habits appear to be the main obstacle to keeping the concrete
barrier from being moved.
"We can't get it to stay in one place because he keeps driving into it," Smith said.
•
Junk quotes. Vague, bureacratic. Quotes that say nothing.
•
Stacking quotes. Just stringing a bunch of them together rather than constructing a
story.
•
Weak lead quotes. Empty, boring, vague, repetetive.
Story organization
Are you a planner or a plunger?
•
Planners execute four or five elements in advance. Plungers start tight in and discover
what they want to say in the process. But they tend to write long and then cut back. They're
slower. They may run out of time and give editors gray hair.
•
Both ways can and do work. But writers need to understand which one they are and
what works for them.
•
Being a plunger requires a good memory and the ability to formulate in your head.
Being a planner requires marking up notes.
LAST POINTS
Make sure every word serves a purpose.
Use transitions. They make for more readable stories.
Write what you know and explain how you learned it.
Write what you don’t know and why you don’t know it.
Anticipate and address readers’ questions.
Never forget that what you write is competing for readers’ attention in an increasingly
competitive marketplace.
MEDIA WRITING STYLE TIPS
Media writing has style characteristics that distinguish it from most formal academic styles. It
guides the way we will write in this class. The tips presented here are not a comprehensive
guide. The Associated Press Stylebook is the ultimate source. Here’s a link to a condensed
version of the book:
http://www.wwu.edu/journalism/syllabi/207labmanual.htm
Now, here is an even shorter version:
Names: Always use full names and titles, where appropriate, on first reference. Use only last
names in subsequent references. If there is more than one person with the same last name, use
Mr., Ms. or Mrs. Persons under 18 can be referred to by their first name after their initial
identification. Identify people in leads generically—a local man, a retired school teacher—
rather than by their name, unless they are well-known. In subsequent paragraphs you will
identify people by name.
Titles and occupations: Specific titles in conjunction with a name are capitalized.
Generally, if there is no name used with the title, it is lower case.
Podunk University President John Doe:
Acme Inc. is expected to select a new president.
Occupations are lower case, as are schools without specific names.
Jack’s father is an electrician.
Jose graduated from an excellent university.
Juan graduated from Podunk University.
Numbers and addresses: In general, spell out numbers from one to ten, and use digits
above that. Notable exceptions include money and addresses, which are always expressed in
numbers. Spell all numbers that start sentences.
Attribution: Attribute all information you do not know on your own. For example,
information used in crime stories almost always comes from the police. Attribution, or citing
your source, is important because it tells readers where the information originates.
A prominent banker has been arrested in connection with a series of armed robberies, police
said Tuesday.
In attributing information and quotes, the word said is usually preferable to others that might
occur to you. These include such words as proclaimed, claimed or expressed. However,
there are times when these words are appropriate. For instance, if someone makes a dubious
assertion, “claimed” is fine.
Leads and body paragraphs: All leads for this class should be no more than 35 words.
They can be as short as you deem necessary. Do not bury the most important information at
the end of your lead. One way to avoid that is by not starting with the date and place.
Body paragraphs can be no more than 40 words.
Yes, these lengths are much shorter than you’ve been taught in other classes. However, you
are writing for online readers. Short paragraphs attract readers, while long ones repel them.
Verb Tense: In general use the simple past tense. Do not use the present tense for things said
or done in the past. Use the future tense when it is indicated. In feature stories or for
broadcast media reports, the present tense is appropriate.
Last points: Use only the words necessary. Wordiness and redundancy make your writing
boring and unlikely to attract readers.
Don’t use jargon, euphemisms or obscure words. Prisons are not correctional facilities. People
die; they don’t pass away. Prevaricate is a word that is not easily recognized.
Above all, never forget that once your academic career is finished, nobody has to read what
you write. Write poorly, and you’ll be ignored. Always write as effectively and engagingly as
possible. Your professional success will depend on it.
Purdue OWL: Journalism and Journalistic Writing
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Subject-Specific Writing
Journalism and Journalistic
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Journalism and Journalistic
Writing
Introduction
AP Style
Media Ethics
The Inverted Pyramid
Writing Leads
Press Releases
Giving to the OWL
Suggested Resources
How to Write a Lead
Summary:
These resources provide an overview of journalistic writing with explanations of the most important
and most often used elements of journalism and the Associated Press style. This resource, revised
according to The Associated Press Stylebook 2012, offers examples for the general format of AP
style. For more information, please consult The Associated Press Stylebook 2012, 47th edition.
Contributors:Christopher Arnold, Tony Cook, Dennis Koyama, Elizabeth Angeli, Joshua M. Paiz
Last Edited: 2013-04-06 07:04:07
Introduction
The lead, or opening paragraph, is the most important part of a news story. With so many
sources of information – newspapers, magazines, TV, radio and the Internet – audiences
simply are not willing to read beyond the first paragraph (and even sentence) of a story
unless it grabs their interest. A good lead does just that. It gives readers the most important
information in a clear, concise and interesting manner. It also establishes the voice and
direction of an article.
Tips for Writing a Lead
-MLA Guide
-APA Guide
-How to Navigate the New OWL
-Media File Index
-OWL Exercises
1. The Five W’s and H: Before writing a lead, decide which aspect of the story – who,
what, when, where, why, how – is most important. You should emphasize those aspects
in your lead. Wait to explain less important aspects until the second or third sentence.
2. Conflict: Good stories have conflict. So do many good leads.
3. Specificity: Though you are essentially summarizing information in most leads, try to
be specific as possible. If your lead is too broad, it won’t be informative or interesting.
4. Brevity: Readers want to know why the story matters to them and they won’t wait long
for the answer. Leads are often one sentence, sometimes two. Generally, they are 25 to
30 words and should rarely be more than 40. This is somewhat arbitrary, but it’s
important – especially for young journalists – to learn how to deliver information
concisely. See the OWL’s page on concise writing for specific tips. The Paramedic
Method is also good for writing concisely.
5. Active sentences: Strong verbs will make your lead lively and interesting. Passive
constructions, on the other hand, can sound dull and leave out important information,
such as the person or thing that caused the action. Incomplete reporting is often a
source of passive leads.
6. Audience and context: Take into account what your reader already knows.
Remember that in today’s media culture, most readers become aware of breaking news
as it happens. If you’re writing for a print publication the next day, your lead should do
more than merely regurgitate yesterday’s news.
7. Honesty: A lead is an implicit promise to your readers. You must be able to deliver
what you promise in your lead.
What to Avoid
1. Flowery language: Many beginning writers make the mistake of overusing adverbs
and adjectives in their leads. Concentrate instead on using strong verbs and nouns.
2. Unnecessary words or phrases: Watch out for unintentional redundancy. For
example, 2 p.m. Wednesday afternoon, or very unique. You can’t afford to waste space
in a news story, especially in the lead. Avoid clutter and cut right to the heart of the
story.
3. Formulaic leads: Because a lot of news writing is done on deadline, the temptation to
write tired leads is strong. Resist it. Readers want information, but they also want to be
entertained. Your lead must sound genuine, not merely mechanical.
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/735/05/[6/17/2016 1:30:35 PM]
Purdue OWL: Journalism and Journalistic Writing
4. It: Most editors frown on leads that begin with the word it because it is not precise and
disorients the reader.
Types of Leads
Summary lead: This is perhaps the most traditional lead in news writing. It is often used for
breaking news. A story about a city council vote might use this “just the facts” approach.
Straight news leads tend to provide answers to the most important three or four of the Five
W’s and H. Historically this type of lead has been used to convey who, what, when and where.
But in today’s fast-paced media atmosphere, a straightforward recitation of who, what, when
and where can sound stale by the time a newspaper hits the stands. Some newspapers are
adjusting to this reality by posting breaking news online as it happens and filling the print
edition with more evaluative and analytical stories focused on why and how. Leads should
reflect this.
Anecdotal lead: Sometimes, beginning a story with a quick anecdote can draw in readers.
The anecdote must be interesting and must closely illustrate the article’s broader point. If you
use this approach, specificity and concrete detail are essential and the broader significance of
the anecdote should be explained within the first few sentences following the lead.
Other types of leads: A large number of other approaches exist, and writers should not feel
boxed in by formulas. That said, beginning writers can abuse certain kinds of leads. These
include leads that begin with a question or direct quotation and those that make a direct
appeal using the word you. While such leads might be appropriate in some circumstances, use
them sparsely and cautiously.
Examples
Summary lead:
County administrator faces ouster
By Tony Cook for The Cincinnati Post, Jan. 14, 2005
Two Hamilton County Commissioners plan to force the county’s top
administrator out of office today.
Commentary: This lead addresses the traditional who, what and when. If this information
had been reported on TV or radio the day before, this lead might not be a good one for the
print edition of the newspaper; however, if the reporter had an exclusive or posted this
information online as soon as it became available, then this lead would make sense. Note that
it is brief (15 words) and uses an active sentence construction.
Summary lead:
Lobbyists flout disclosure rules in talks with commissioners
By Tony Cook and Michael Mishak for the Las Vegas Sun, July 13, 2008
On more than 170 occasions this year, lobbyists failed to file
disclosure forms when they visited Clark County commissioners,
leaving the public in the dark about what issues they were pushing
and on whose behalf.
Commentary: This lead is more representative of the less timely, more analytical approach
that some newspapers are taking in their print editions. It covers who, what and when, but
also why it matters to readers. Again, it uses active verbs, it is specific (170 occasions) and it
is brief (35 words).
Anecdotal lead:
Tri-staters tell stories of the devastating tsunami
By Tony Cook for The Cincinnati Post, Jan. 8, 2005
From Dan Ralescu’s sun-warmed beach chair in Thailand, the Indian
Ocean began to look, oddly, not so much like waves but bread dough.
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Purdue OWL: Journalism and Journalistic Writing
Commentary: This article is a local angle on the devastating tsunami that struck Southeast
Asia in 2005. As a result of the massive death toll and worldwide impact, most readers would
have been inundated with basic information about the tsunami. Given that context, this lead
uses an unexpected image to capture the reader’s attention and prepare them for a new take
on the tsunami. Again, it is brief (23 words).
Question lead:
Same lobbyist for courts, shorter term, more money
By Tony Cook for the Las Vegas Sun, June 29, 2008
What’s increasing faster than the price of gasoline? Apparently, the
cost of court lobbyists.
District and Justice Court Judges want to hire lobbyist Rick Loop for
$150,000 to represent the court system in Carson City through the
2009 legislative session. During the past session, Loop’s price tag
was $80,000.
Commentary: Question leads can be useful in grabbing attention, but they are rarely as
effective as other types of leads in terms of clearly and concisely providing the main point of a
story. In this case, the second paragraph must carry a lot of the weight that would normally
be handled in the lead.
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