In Unit 2, you viewed The Legacy of Unresolved Loss: A Family Systems Approach, in which you were introduced to David Rogers and his daughter, Michelle. In the third session, David and Michelle began to become more comfortable. Address the following:How would you describe the family from a multicultural perspective? Considering these issues, what is important to note in understanding this family?Where is the family in its life-cycle development? What are the current challenges it faces?David RogersMonica, I have been thinking a lot about last week and I still feel that it is important that we focus on the present and not so much on the past. I mean, we spent a good deal with the session last week as an example, talking about Michelle's grandmother who Michelle saw for only about four months total in her entire life and I really think we need to focus on the present and Michelle's behavior which was continuing to be very difficult.Monica McGoldrickI have to tell you that from my perspective, the past really influenced the present in such important ways that we cannot deal with that.I have not been able to forge a connection with David yet. So I do not have a strong enough footing to confront his resistance.  Instead, I will go with his concerns and look for ways to connect them with the family history that seems to be the cause of their current distress.But I will tell you what let us start with what is happening now that obviously there is something that you wanted me to understand that you think I do not yet understand. So would you tell me what that is?Kathleen RogersMay I explain?David RogersGo ahead. Go ahead.Kathleen RogersThank you dear. Well this past week, Michelle has been listening to this new rap music that goes thug, thug or something and it pounds continually. I think it is these kids that she hanging out with that are --Monica McGoldrickNot how Kathleen jumps in to protect David from having to express his feelings. It may be that he is so disconnected from the family that he does not really know what the trouble is.David RogersKathleen really gets the ran of it because I am at work all day and I come home late and I hear these tales and it is --Monica McGoldrickWell I am not really clear. What is it exactly that bothers you? The music bothers you and what they wear bothers you.There is something here that just does not wash. When parents make superficial criticisms of their children's friends, I often find it is a code for class or culture.Kathleen RogersThe common area that I think is really bad for Michelle to go down to.David RogersWe just feel --Kathleen RogersI do not -- I am sorry.David RogersGo ahead.Kathleen RogersI just do not feel that she is safe with these kids.Monica McGoldrickNow is it -- I know you are relatively new to this situation but is it your sense that Michelle has changed the friends she hangs out with, that she used to have a different group of friends?Michelle RogersThey are Black and Puerto Rican kids. That is the bottom line.David RogersNo, no. That is not it at all because their behavior is got nothing to do with their color or race or anything.Kathleen RogersMichelle, I grew up with Black's and Puerto Rican's. I am used to them. No, it is not what they are. It is what they are doing that we are upset about and what concerns.Monica McGoldrickTell me a little bit about your friends, what they are like.Michelle RogersI met them at this summer theatre group that I was in last year and they are all into this just really cool stuff.Monica McGoldrickAnd like what?Michelle RogersCarlos writes poetry. He writes some good stuff too, it is really deep. And Serena is in this Latin folk band and they mix a lot of different kinds of musics on it.Monica McGoldrickDo you kind of feel connected to them in some way because it is like part of your heritage we were talking about last time or no?Michelle RogersYeah. They know where I am coming from. They are my people.Monica McGoldrickAnd what do you think about your father and Kathleen's concerns about that? I mean, obviously they care about you and they care where you are going. And it sounds like they are really worried about your connection to these friends, should they be?Michelle RogersConcerned? I would think that they would want me to be happy. Hanging out with them makes me happy.Monica McGoldrickI am reframing the parent's criticism as concern to see if Michelle sees any validity at all in their comments.Kathleen RogersBut I am not happy that Celina just got a tattoo and that you think that is very cool.Michelle RogersThis one does like washes off in two weeks.Monica McGoldrickAdolescence generally do not reveal themselves in front of their parents so, I met with Michelle alone to get to know her better.Monica McGoldrickI thought it would be good idea for us to get to talk alone a little bit because I am not really sure what is happening here with your parents. I talked to your guidance counselor and she says, she has known you, she thinks you are basically a terrific kid but you have really been different the past couple of months so, she was sort of worried about it. That is what she said why she had referred you and I do not know what you think about that I mean, you think she should be worried?Michelle RogersI mean, I am not really doing anything major. Yeah, I cut a couple of classes here and there and yeah.Monica McGoldrickBut what she told is different because she said, you have always been a good student, you have been really hassling some of your teachers, cutting in ways that you never did before and her sense is something is happening. Your parent's fantasies are obviously going wild. I think it comes from really caring about you. So, you need to know that.Michelle RogersI mean I know that a major thing that we are in comfort with is that they do not like the friends that I have been hanging out with lately and -- but they think that -- they just assume that just because they are Black and Puerto Rican that they are doing all these things like that is all that we see in the media and TV and stuff and it is not like that. They are really cool kids and know so many things that I can do with them that none of my other friends in the past they would really could understand it -- I feel like I can relate to someone them in ways I was never able to relate with anybody else.Monica McGoldrickSo you feel like you share interests like you were talking about Carlos and writing poems and your other friend Serena. So why are your parents do you think that these kids are going nowhere? Do they know these kids?Michelle RogersI do not know. They have not even given them a chance.Monica McGoldrickReally?Michelle RogersThey are just going to listen to what other parents are saying or whatever. Just because they are not from the same neighborhood, and by the way, that means that there is something wrong with them.Monica McGoldrickBut -- I mean, you can understand yourself that -- because you must see it with other kids that it is easy to get in with the wrong crowd, it is easy to get into a situation where peer pressure can --Michelle RogersYeah, but that is not me. That is not me.Monica McGoldrickOkay, well I am just asking because I do not know you.Her reaction here seems pretty genuine. I do not think that he knew friends are the problem.And because it sounds like there has been a recent change. And that is what I am trying to figure out is what happened recently. I mean, I know last time you were saying that at home, the focus seems to be on the baby but the baby is two not -- I mean that is-- not that recent. What do you think is upsetting your parents so much now?Michelle RogersJust I am hanging out with Puerto Rican kids.Monica McGoldrickAll right. Why is that so upsetting to them?Michelle RogersI do not know why it is so upsetting to them but you see yourself I mean, when my father is talking about my grandmother, it was like she was nonperson.Monica McGoldrickHe does not know how connected you are to her?Michelle RogersWe are her family.Monica McGoldrickWell, I mean, that is true but I do not know. I could not really tell what that was about. Have you ever talked to him about what that means to you?Michelle RogersNo. He would not understand. He would not get it.Monica McGoldrickReally? Do you miss your mother?Michelle RogersDo I miss my mother? Yeah.Monica McGoldrickWas there something that was triggered when your grandmother died?Michelle RogersMy father like want us to ignore that and even like had any relevance in my life but --. I was with my grandmother when I found out about my mother died. She was the one that was there for me not my father. And it should have been him.Monica McGoldrickSo have you ever talked to him about that?Michelle RogersHe would not --. No.Monica McGoldrickHe would not what?Michelle RogersI think he is not fit.Monica McGoldrickOkay. But maybe that is the issue. I mean, maybe you and he just need to get connected in a way that it has really been missing for you I do not know but that is what it sounds like, and he does not know where have you been at.Michelle RogersHe does not even take the time to try to find out either. So, how can he know?Monica McGoldrickThis is a real break. So far, I have not seen any way to get David to deal with his grief. Michelle needs to confront him about he is being shutdown with her. If David sees that this is hurting their relationship, it may motivate him to face up to his own unresolved mourning.I think maybe we need to talk about this and that some of his resistance about the relevance of your history, you can tell him about. I mean, I cannot, he is not going to hear it from me but he is going to hear it from you and he is going to know that that is what is relevant because that is history that you and he share.Michelle RogersHe just do not want to talk about it.Monica McGoldrickWell, maybe it is time to talk about it.Michelle RogersNo, you heard him. When he was here, he was "Why are we even talking about stuff that has to do with the past?"Monica McGoldrickOkay. But you can help him to understand that. And I will help you.Because of the uneven power relationship between Michelle and her father, I wanted to make it very clear that I would lend my support to her attempt to discuss their shared history. While we were alone, I also checked about her use of drugs and alcohol and I felt reasonably confident that this was not a problem. I then met with David and Kathleen to give them my assessment of Michelle.Monica McGoldrickIt is clear to me that she feels not as well connected to you, that she cannot really talk to you, that she has not talked to you. She said that she has never been able to talk you about her mother's death. When you say to me, "Let us forget the history, we got to deal with this present problem." The sense I have is that the present problem is related to the history and the fact that you and she cannot share the history matters. And I think we need to just talk to her about it.This is David and Michelle's history before Kathleen's time. I want her to stay out of the discussion but I want her to be present for two reasons. It is history she should know about and I do not want her to feel excluded from the therapy.I think this relates to a history that is before your time. If you were God, I do not think you could get right with Michelle until she feels better connected to her father and better able to deal with the loss of her mother. So I think that some of what you were very irritated about with her in terms -- I mean, some of it is just being a teenager, let us face it but some of it is, that she is struggling to put together a history that was before your time. And I think she needs to work it out with her father and that is not your problem. You know what I mean?Do you remember how you first found out that she was ill?Michelle RogersShe called me and so I ran to her bedroom and -- Monica McGoldrickYour father was not there?Michelle RogersNo. He was working.,/Monica McGoldrickReally? And what did she say?Michelle RogersShe just said that she was -- said mommy is sick and I do not know. And not to worry and that everything was going to be fine but if she was not able to do some of the things that she -- some time in the near future that -- Monica McGoldrickHave you ever talked to your father about this?David RogersI was concerned about upsetting them too much. I thought that it might actually be counterproductive in terms of Diane's wellbeing.Monica McGoldrickBefore you made reference to how hard it was, she had a lot of pain in the last period?David RogersShe lost a great deal of weight and -- do we really have to talk about this?Monica McGoldrickI think it matters a lot for you and your daughter to share. I know that it is hard.David RogersShe lost a great deal of weight.Monica McGoldrickAre you okay with that? Do you see why it matters for her?David RogersIn the end she was in the hospital for about three month's total. And she gradually became weaker and of course she was connected up to IV most of the time.Monica McGoldrickNow you said before, Michelle, that you had actually been with your grandmother at the time your mother actually died. How did that happened?Michelle RogersWell, they sent me to Puerto Rico. So I was down there when I found out that she died.Monica McGoldrickReally? How long have you been there?Michelle RogersThat point I was probably there already for almost two months, a month and a half.Monica McGoldrickDo you remember when you found out that she had died?Michelle RogersI think it was yesterday.Monica McGoldrickReally? What do you remember?I often find that asking a client to recall specific details of a painful event elicits a more genuine emotional response.Michelle RogersI was in the kitchen and I was cutting up the peppers for the sofrito because she was going to make some rice and beans. And the phone rang in the living room but I could see her. It was like the kitchen and there is the living room. And I think I almost knew even when the phone rang but she picked up the phone and she stood there and she dropped the phone and she started screaming "Oh my God, Oh my God. Not my baby. Not my baby." That is when I knew.Monica McGoldrickI find it is very important to give people the time to work through moments like this.And then what? Did you and your grandmother come up together for the funeral or how did that happened?Michelle RogersWe stayed down there.Monica McGoldrickWhat do you mean you stayed down there?Michelle RogersMy father called me that you are on -- that they necessarily do not -- because we might as well just stay the month and wait till your flight at the end of the month to come home.David RogersSee I thought that -- I gave some thought to whether she would come back to the funeral and for a while I thought that would be a good idea. But then after thinking about it some more, I thought well, she was going to be hanging around a funeral home for a few hours and going through all that and --Monica McGoldrickCan I interrupt you? Can I ask you, what are you feeling now about this?I did not want David to distance himself from these feelings so, I tried to bring him back into the moment. His response came as a complete surprise.David RogersI really had no idea Michelle that you felt so strongly --Michelle RogersShe was my mother.David RogersNot about your mother of course but the whole thing with your grandmother. I had somehow put that behind me and it seems so long ago. And I feel very guilty that I did not tell you about your grandmother's death.Monica McGoldrickWhat do you mean?David RogersWell I just did -- frankly, I just did not think it was important at the time.Monica McGoldrickYou did not know your grandmother died?Michelle RogersI sort of found out.Monica McGoldrickWhat do you mean?David RogersWell there was this phone message apparently that, Alicia, my wife's sister called from Puerto Rico telling us about Carmen's death and --Michelle RogersAnd then I came home from school and heard it.Monica McGoldrickNow this is just recently right? This is just a few months ago?Michelle RogersYeah. I came from school and I heard it and I just -- I went to my room. And then Kathleen came home later on and she played the messages. And I heard her playing the messages and I expect that afterwards she was going to come say something to me or come to my room.David RogersIt was not her fault she talked to me about it.Michelle RogersDo not be -- Monica McGoldrickSo, when did you talked about it?Michelle RogersWe did not.David RogersWell, I was so busy that week and I just thought -- I thought about Carmen as someone that Michelle had very little connection with anymore. We do not talk about Carmen. And I remembered it later in the week and we did talk briefly about it then.Michelle RogersWe talked about it? You said "Oh, by the way, you remember Carmen from Puerto Rico? Well, she died." I mean, we talked about it. And so, yeah, thanks for telling me.Monica McGoldrickSo the two of you really never talked about any of this? It sounds like --I was impressed and I have to say astonished at how much David seemed to be connecting with his daughter in her emotional experience. You can never be to sure you know how another person will react. I would have thought it would take a lot more for David to open up like that.And then this is making me think that maybe some of what has gotten you upset, Michelle, the past few months is really that Carmen's death just kind of brought this whole thing back. And it maybe the lack of connection between the two of you is just gotten too big and that you really -- I mean, she really needs you obviously. And maybe some of what you have said about your Puerto Rican friends is a part of something very natural really that you did not get to have your mother as long as you needed her. And so that is part of finding out who you are. What did your mother do? I mean, did she work or something?Michelle RogersShe used to write plays.David RogersActually, Diane and I met when I was in graduate school, I was a bit of a rebel in those days and -- she was in a writing program at Columbia and --Monica McGoldrickReally?David RogersYeah. I mean, she wrote this political piece that I got involved in.Monica McGoldrickOkay.David RogersI did a couple plays back then.Monica McGoldrickReally?David RogersYeah.Monica McGoldrickYou do not seem like the type because you do not want to like saying stuff.Michelle RogersYou are really on plays dad?David RogersYeah. I did a couple of plays.Michelle RogersGo figure.Monica McGoldrickWhen people disconnect because of the pain of their loses, they often bury important parts of themselves as well.Well, I think this is really important to -- that there is a lot that matters to share, that we all carry our history with us. And that -- probably, there is a lot of your -- of what you know about Diane that matters. Well let me ask you something, I am very conscious that Julian is not here and because he is a part of this history too. What --when -- is there some possibility that we could get him in too?David RogersI do not think that is possible. He is on Colorado so.Monica McGoldrickSo to me this is the same point just as she needs you to be her father. Maybe this is important for him too. She needs her brother and he needs to be a part of this, it was his mother too.David RogersI suppose that is a very expensive weekend.Monica McGoldrickBut it is a very valuable family is it not? A part of you knows this is really crucial but I still think it really matters.Assignment 2 Jeff and Marci have been married for five years. Since their marriage, they have had two children. Their son is in kindergarten, and their daughter is in pre-K. Recently, Marci and Jeff have been struggling with the balance of work and family. Marci works 30 hours a week, and Jeff is supposed to work around 50 hours a week but has been working close to 65. Marci is not happy that Jeff has been working so many hours. Jeff has been missing out on their son's karate expos and their daughter's plays in school. Marci has tried to talk to him about coming home for at least dinner and then returning to work after the kids are bathed and put to bed. Jeff does not understand why Marci is giving him so much trouble about him working so hard. He explains to her that he is doing it to support the family. The more he works, the more likely he will be promoted and see an increase in his salary. Marci is not concerned about the money. She would rather have him home with the kids, because she feels they are only young once and that Jeff is missing out on their developmental process.Assess this case from a systemic or relational perspective. Be sure to address the following:Identifying the clients.Identifying what systemic model of therapy you would use. (You will use this model for your final project.)Determining the goals according to that model.Explaining the role of the therapist using that model.Assignment 3 Opportunities and ResilienceResources Discussion Participation Scoring Guide. Crane grew up on a farm in rural Kentucky and lived a life full of transitions and experiences.Crane's father had only a 10th-grade education, and his mother a sixth-grade education. Crane was the oldest of two children. He attended the local school in his neighborhood. After school, he would come home and help work the farm, complete his homework, and read anything he found around the house or neighborhood. Crane loved reading books about adventures. He was the first in his family to attend college.After receiving his bachelor's degree in education at the local state university, he taught school in a one-room schoolhouse for four years and then become principal of a high school in Indiana. During this time, he met his future wife, Faith, who was the secretary at the school. They dated for a year and then married. They had one child, a son named Steven. Crane left the rural Midwest to attend Yale University, where he earned his doctorate. He became a professor of anthropology and taught at The Ohio State University until he retired at the age of 60.Then Crane and Faith bought an abandoned farm comprising several acres in Ohio. They remodeled the farmhouse and settled into farming in the early years of retirement. Crane cleared and thinned the trees on the hills and mountains of his farm. After some time, he stopped working the hillsides and along with his wife and grandchildren planted a large vegetable garden. When he reached 80, he bought a riding tractor. When he could no longer manage the garden, he focused on four large window boxes where he and his wife planted flowers. As his eyesight became more impaired, he started listening to audiobooks.Faith said Crane never complained about any of his declining aging process changes. Crane approached each new challenge of physical decline by correctly assessing his abilities, investing in a new project and taking pride in his achievements. However, lately he has become more demanding and attempts to engage in activities that require skills he no longer has. When he is unable to accomplish these, he becomes withdrawn and uncommunicative. Faith decided that she needs to come to family therapy with Crane to seek ways to cope with the situation.As Faith and Crane's therapist, use the model you have chosen for your final project to respond to the following:How would you join with Faith and Crane?What types of interventions would you use according to the model?What would be some goals you would develop with this couple according to the model?How does culture play a role in this case?