editing on a paper

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rylnff77

Writing

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down there are some instruction to edit on the paper. therefore i would like it to be fixed according to these notes.

As for the writing, it feels like you jump right into the heart of the argument here. Make sure you take some time to introduce the paper rather than jumping to the "several requests for euthanasia." That catches a reader off guard and therefore I think some of the first paragraph is lost. I also struggled to pick up on what you were specifically arguing. Make sure your thesis makes a claim, notes how you'll support it, suggests why it's important, and even discusses the counter argument.

The first two paragraphs discuss the "slippery slope" which I don't think is quite clear yet. Before using that as a form of support make sure it's clear to the reader what it is and how it applies here.

Sometimes it's not exactly clear how you're using research to build your argument. For example, on pg. 4 you have the example of "Mrs. A" but the paragraph ends after the information is provided. Make sure that after you include something from a source you're explaining how that drives your claim forward. How are you using the information to build your case?

As for your personal stake to close out the paper, I would avoid that. Remember, this is a research based paper so the only place where your opinion should be present is in the research you include. Do you have any questions about this? Please do let me know.

I think the main trouble spot here is having a focused argument. Can you be more specific than just saying whether or not PAS should be allowed?

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Effects of allowance of Physician assisted suicide on society Elyass Bin Alsheikh Exploratory Writing 7/28/2017 English 101-005 1 There were several requests for euthanasia in Washington State, but physicians always responded with the rejection. The reason why Physicians were rejecting assisted suicide is that they wanted to know what was pushing people to make such a decision like euthanasia. Then, after couple surveys, the common answer physicians received is patients According to Washington State Department of Health 2010 Death with Dignity Act Report people felt there is no solution to their situations, or there are much worse states than death, where they cannot participate in entertaining activities (et al, Shariff, M J.). However, doctors at all times have the hope to find a sufficient medicine for any illness. Furthermore, the act of euthanasia will lead to the abuse toward patients, and may lead to doubt doctor’s integrity, which is significant problem if there is no trust between patient and their healers. In addition, Euthanasia contrasts the Hippocratic Oath “First, do no harm”, which every doctor has to swear by, and by ending a patient life the harm begins not only to the patient, but also to the society. Allowing this immoral act under firm circumstances and complicated rules will be followed by easier rules, which is an excellent example of the Slippery Slope argument that is presented by lawyer Eugene Volokh in his article The Mechanism of the Slippery Slope. To every idea people will take two sides, supporters, and opponents. Assisted suicide idea has divided people to more than two side. There are the people who support, against, and there are doctors who have been separated from the rest of the society, where they have the final decision on whether to assist ending one’s life or not. There are no rules to permit assisted suicide in all over the world due to ethical, religious, and moral reasons. However, there are some places where assisted suicide is legal and allowed. For instance, in Belgium, Physician Assisted Suicide (PAS) is permitted only to those who 2 are having somatic/non-somatic diseases which is called “Benelux laws” (ea. Al, Shariff, M, J.). Furthermore, According to Shariff in his article, “Assisted death and the slippery slope—finding clarity amid advocacy, convergence, and complexity”. The Author claims that the request of PAS is on the rise since 2002 to 2009, where the number rose from 259 to 1526. In Belgium which is only one example of countries that allow PAS, according to Dr. Benatar, to be forced to live a life that is full of pain and intolerable is inexpressible violation of one’s freedom to live or to die. Still, Dr. Benatar claims that people who argue the slippery slope have failed to justify their rejection to PAS. Benatar states that if we can think of a patient suffering and how hard their lives when it is ending on a slow pace, we would re consider PAS as an appropriate solution to end the suffering. Also, there are several states in the U.S that allows people to end their own life such as, Oregon, and Washington. Moreover, one of the biggest burdens on permanent ill people in places that do not offer free healthcare for the public. High costs and the amount of debts that accumulate on patient’s shoulders contribute to make the decision of PAS. Per Dr. FRIEDMAN from the American Journal of Medical Research, the healthcare system in the United States is “mess” compared to many different countries; in addition to the costs that are rising, while patient’s outcomes declining. In 2009 the U.S wasted about $750 billion on healthcare systems, while there was 75,000 people who died because of inadequate healthcare system (Fox, 2012). On the other hand, we get to people who do not favor PAS and do not consider it as a solution at any cause or cost. Opponents to PAS always finding solutions to avoid ending one’s life whatsoever. Therefore, they propose Palliative care to permanent ill people. Referring to the article “Discussing Palliative Care with Patients” by Dr. Lo, B in 3 Annals of Internal Medicine. Palliative focuses on the physical and psychosocial support as it relief their pain and save their dignity as many patients may feel they are humiliated when asking people to clean after them, or being presented in front of friends and the community as unable individuals. At the same time, palliative care deals with Physicians and doctors in term of teaching them how to respond to difficult statements and questions. Palliative care continuously tends to utilize family members as a part of the nursing team, where a study indicates that family members often raise extra issues, which might be important to patient’s healthcare. For example, Mrs. A’s concerns about the final stages of her dying husband, helped to elevate major part of her husband’s suffering. Moreover, Mrs. A’s fears and concerns were important to her husband’s health situation before they address physician’s treatment plans (Quill, T. 1999) Opponents to PSA or in other word euthanasia believe the act of ending someone’s life is unethical, and immoral. They discuss PAS in terms of religion and how it contradicts almost all known religions in the world. Moreover, it breaches the first amendment of the Hippocratic Oath, where it exactly specifies doing no harm. According to Dr. Leiva, R. in “Death, suffering, and euthanasia”, Dr. Leiva states in her article in response to Dr. Boisvert “euthanasia is a is a betrayal of our ultimate mandate not to cause harm and it reflects misguided compassion”, which declare his clear opinion against PAS. Additionally, Dr. Leiva claims with allowing euthanasia more crimes would occur by doctors toward their patients which lead to the loss of trust between doctors and patients; for illustrations Dr. Leiva mentions that there are many lives that have been terminated without the patient’s consent, or even the family’s agreement. However, she 4 claims that there are fewer death situations in Canada by cancer than losses in Hollande without a clear request. Personal stakeholder. What I believe is, there are many situations and circumstances that only patients themselves know about. The pain and the hardness of the treatment they receive make me think that I cannot have an opinion on the decision of whether doing PAS or not. I never known the struggle of a harsh disease yet, that leads an adult human begin, conscious to choose death over treatment. There must be good reasons behind patient’s choices. However, I can relate to PAS from a religious perspective, where in Christianity in many places in Bible PAS or Killing the self is forbidden “for with you is the fountain of life; in your light, we see light” (Psalm 36;9, Holy Bible). Moreover, Bible considers killing self a murder. Therefore, is clearly states “You shall not murder” (Exodus 20:13, Holy Bible). Also, in Islam killing self is forbidden in many places in Holy Quran for example “And do not kill yourselves. Surely, God is Most Merciful to you.” (Alnisa 4:29, Holy Quran). In addition to many religions that forbid killing self. Furthermore, I can relate to PAS from the medical field view, where the process of making new drugs, and new medication depend on trails and experimenting. Therefore, if people will always think of PAS as their ultimate solution, it will affect the process of creating new medicine. In conclusion, I have displayed the different points of views on Physician assisted suicide (PAS) or what is called euthanasia and how it might affect society, doctor’s integrity, and people trust. Additionally, I state both supporter’s opinion, which is clearly indicated and their demand for freedom to die as well as their freedom to live. On the other hand, opponents to PAS, which includes proposed solutions to be taken instead of 5 euthanasia. Finally, my personal opinion on what effect, and how it’s important to keep the one’s life until the last day of it. In addition to religious beliefs about PAS, how it’s forbidden in Christian or in Islam. 6 Work cited. 1) Bernard Lo, MD; Timothy Quill, MD; and James Tulsky, MD, for the ACP–ASIM End-of-Life Care Consensus Panel 4 May 1999 • Annals of Internal Medicine 2) Benatar, D. "A legal right to die: responding to slippery slope and abuse arguments." Current Oncology. Multimed Inc., Oct. 2011. Web. 28 July 2017. 3) FRIEDMAN, DEBORAH, et al. "Us Healthcare: A System in Need of a Cure." American Journal of Medical Research, vol. 3, no. 1, Jan. 2016, pp. 125-141. EBSCOhost, search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&db=a9h&AN=114705456&site=ehost-live. 4) Leiva, René A. "Death, suffering, and euthanasia." Canadian Family Physician. College of Family Physicians of Canada, June 2010. Web. 28 July 2017. 5) Shariff, M.J. "Assisted death and the slippery slope—finding clarity amid advocacy, convergence, and complexity." Current Oncology. Multimed Inc., June 2012. Web. 28 July 2017. 6) Warraich, Haider Javed. "On Assisted Suicide, Going Beyond ‘Do No Harm’." The New York Times. The New York Times, 04 Nov. 2016. Web. 28 July 2017. 7
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Hello below I have edited the paper to make it more concise. Also I didn't make it to extreme on the editing so it seem like a totally different person did the editing. I took out the opinions sections to stay on the research paper format. If you need anything else just let me know. Ill be happy to help!

Effects of allowance of Physician assisted suicide on society
Elyass Bin Alsheikh
Exploratory Writing
7/28/2017
English 101-005

Euthanasia in our current society is the act of ending one’s life painlessly, so what would
drive a person to such extremes to end their life? According to Washington State Department of
Health in 2010 the Death with Dignity Act reported some people felt there is no solution to their
situations, or the pain they endured was much worse states than death (et al, Shariff, M J.).
Physiologically it is difficult to not participate in entertaining activities that others around them
enjoying (et al, Shariff, M J.). In the state of Washington, many requests for euthanasia have
been submitted but physicians always responded with the rejection. The reason why Physicians
were rejecting assisted suicide was it goes against the Hippocratic Oath which states, “First, do
no harm”, which every doctor has to swear by. Then by ending a patient life the harm does end
with the patient, but also to the society (family and friends). Allowing this act under firm
circumstances only complicates rules and furthermore is complicated by claims of abuse of
patients. The claims of abuse now bring into question the doctor’s integrity which can strain the
trust between the doctor and the patient on such a terrible situation. The pros and cons of this
very real situati...

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