Make revisions to Education Proposal per professor comments

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MAKE REVISION TO PROPOSAL PER PROFESSOR COMMENTS AND PICS BELOW:

MAKE THESIS STRONGER AND OTHER CHANGES REQUESTED BELOW

MAKE CHANGES TO OUTLINE AND SUBTOPICS AS NEEDED

TOPIC: WHY PARENT INVOLVEMENT IS IMPORTANT ON A CHILD'S EDUCATION

Professor Comments:

She said it wasn’t a clear thesis .....had a lot of grammar errors . She said the thesis is only one sentence telling what the three points is that I'm going to be talking about in the paper....&& some of the points were to close together and that I️ wasn’t going to be able to find a lot of information on them because they relate a lot

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Merritt 1 STUDENT Tutor: Course: April 3, 2018 Introduction Parental involvement is a cornerstone of the education of any child. It makes a very considerable difference child's school life both in general enjoyment and academic success. Parental involvement has been for a long time been known for improving the behaviour of the child, positive attitude and regular attendance. Additionally, it shows the child that the parent is caring about his or her schooling and education. This makes such a child appreciate the importance of education. It also helps them in understanding that what they are doing has got a purpose. Thesis Statement This study is meant to look at the various benefits that to a child whose parent has shown considerable involvement in their education and then make a comparison with a child with no parental involvement. The study will not only look at the academic performance but also cocurricular activities, behavior and attitude in school life. Outline of Major Points and Sub-points I. Parental involvement leads to improved behavior, positive attitude and regular attendance II. Parental involvement provides the support network for the child which helps the child in facing academic challenges Merritt 2 III. Parental involvement shows the children that their parents care about their schooling and education. IV. It also helps in improving the child’s academic performance. Merritt 3 Works Cited Robinson, K., and A. L. Harris. The broken compass: Parental involvement with children's education. 2014. Shane, J., and M. Maxson. Parental involvement. 2017. .nl Verizon LTE 1:08 PM @ * 3% ev.turnitin.com Research Pro... Kames... PROPOSAL+(1) (... Criteria Score Introduction-33 pts. Paragraph provides background information on the topic. 15 Thesis Statement-33 pts Score 20 Contains a clear thesis statement which clearly explains points that will be discussed in the paper Score 30 Outline-34 pts Contains a brief outline that lists the major points to be discussed in the paper and sub- points that will be used to support each main point. Total Score: 65 Close m X Feedback Studio edback - English X Secure https://ev.turnitin.com/app/carta/en_us/?o=940464211&s=3&u=1070618161&student_user=1&lang=en us Kamesha Merritt PROPOSAL+(1) (1) (1).docx back studio English Composition April 3, 2018 Introduction Parental involvement is a cornerstone of the education of any child. It makes a very Unclear considerable difference child's school life both in general enjoyment and academic success. Missing Parental involvement has been for a long time been known for improving This is unclear and needs to be revised. child, positive attitude and regular attend Unclear dditionally, it shows the Revise Caring about his or her schooling and education. This makes such a child + importance of education. It also helps them in understanding that what the purpose. Thesis Statement This study is meant to look at the various benefits that to a child whose parent has shown ge: 1 of 3 Word Count: 244 he esc # 7 芬多 A 2 % 5 4 6 7 8 9 w e t cure | https://ev.turnitin.com/app/carta/en_us/?o=940464211&s=3&u=1070618161&student_user=1&lang=en_us studio Kamesha Merritt PROPOSAL+(1) (1) (1).docx English Composition This is unclear and needs to be revised. April 3, 2018 Parental involve any child. It makes a very Unclear considerable difference ent and academic success. Parental involvement h proving t Spelling Error or of the child, positive attitude and regular attend Unclear dditionally, it shows the child that the parent is Revise caring about his or her schooling and education. This makes such a child appreciate the importance of education. It also helps them in understanding that what they are doing has got a purpose. Thesis Statement This study is meant to look at the various benefits that to a child whose parent has shown Word Count: 244 Text hp $ 10 u 0 % A & 3 4. 6 7 9 e r у U Secure https://ev.turnitin.com/app/carta/en_us/?o=940464211&s=3&u=1070618161&student_user=1&lang=en feedback studio Kamesha Merritt PROPOSAL (1) (1) (1 English Comnosition Revise because this statement contains grammatical errors. Introduction ement is a cornerstone of the education of any child. It makes a very Unclear child's school life both in general enjoyment and academic success. Missing as been for a long time been known for improving tSpelling Error ir of the Cu..ld, positive attitude and regular attend Unclear dditionally, it shows the child that the parent is caring about his or her schooling and education. This makes such a child appreciate the importance of education. It also helps them in understanding that what they are doing has got a purpose. Thesis Statement This study is meant to look at the various benefits that to a child whose parent has shown Page: 1 of 3 Word Count: 244 O hp esc 2 JU 0 2 3 4 % 5 & 7 8 9 w e е r t y
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Explanation & Answer

Perfectly corrected.

Merritt 1
STUDENT
Tutor:
Course:
April 3, 2018
Education Proposal
Introduction
Parental involvement is a cornerstone of the education of any child, for a parent has a very
important part to play in the child’s education. The child’s early years of development are very
important for the cogn...


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