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Analytical Exploration Response

Content type
User Generated
Subject
English
School
University of South Florida
Type
Homework
Rating
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Running head: REVISION PROCESS 1
Revision Process
Name
Institution

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REVISION PROCESS 2
Revision Process
Sentence-level Edits
Original sentence: A public transport system should be safety of the people, accessibility from
main residential areas and commercial destinations, and capacity and comfort for the target
population.
Revised Sentence: A public transport system should ensure safety of the people, accessibility
from main residential areas and commercial destinations, and capacity and comfort for the target
population.
In the above sentence-level revision, I replaced the word ‘be’ with ‘ensure’ as a grammatical
correction. The error was fixed to communicate better and clearly about my topic, hence
assisting in ensuring clarity of the overall argument.
Original sentence: The research shows that CNG-busses are cost-effective and hence this is a
feasible improvement which also produces up to $2 billion dollars savings per year on health
benefits in the US (Olawepo and Chen, 2019).
Revised Sentence: The research shows that CNG-busses are cost-effective and hence this is a
feasible improvement which also produces up to $2 billion savings per year on health benefits in
the US (Olawepo and Chen, 2019).
The revision I made in this sentence was removing ‘dollars’ after ‘$2 billion’. I made this
revision because the dollar sign before the figure makes the word ‘dollars’ redundant. This
revision helps in producing grammatical correctness which works towards improving the quality
of the essay.
Original Sentence: It also includes parking for bikers and racks which allow bikers to bring
their bicycles in their trip to and from commercial areas.

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Running head: REVISION PROCESS 1 Revision Process Name Institution REVISION PROCESS 2 Revision Process Sentence-level Edits Original sentence: A public transport system should be safety of the people, accessibility from main residential areas and commercial destinations, and capacity and comfort for the target population. Revised Sentence: A public transport system should ensure safety of the people, accessibility from main residential areas and commercial destinations, and capacity and comfort for the target population. In the above sentence-level revision, I replaced the word ‘be’ with ‘ensure’ as a grammatical correction. The error was fixed to communicate better and clearly about my topic, hence assisting in ensuring clarity of the overall argument. Original sentence: The research shows that CNG-busses are cost-effective and hence this is a feasible improvement which also produces up to $2 billion dollars savings per year on health benefits in the US (Olawepo and Chen, 2019). Revised Sentence: The research shows that CNG-busses are cost-effective and hence this is a feasible improvement which also produces up to $2 billion savings per year on health benefits in th ...
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Anonymous
Awesome! Perfect study aid.

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