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COM 155 Final

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Com/155 Final
The two paragraphs I read were about individual’s credit. Of the two paragraphs I read,
paragraph three was smoothly written [The passive voice is a form of "be" (was) and a
participle (written). Over-use of the passive voice can make paragraphs officious and
tedious to read. Try to use the active voice most often; for example, passive voice = The
paper was completed on time. Active voice = the student completed the paper on time--
See eCampus > Center for Writing Excellence > Tutorials & Guides > Grammar & Writing
Guides > Active & passive voice] and was fluent in explaining the reasons for individual credit
denial when compared to the second paragraph I read, paragraph four. The author [If this
means yourself, avoid referring to yourself in the third person; if this is a personal
account, use the first person (I, me, my)] provided information on credit worthiness and
states that individuals should try to repair their credit from the reasons on the provided under the
Fair Credit Reporting Act. The author repeatedly used the word “individuals” to start of
sentences, which can provide a way to change the sentence structure. By changing the
sentence structure it can be worded [Passive voice] to make a paragraph, instead of all
statements. Even with errors in grammar, and repetitive use of words, the paragraph is straight
to the point. The author of paragraph four starts with a good topic sentence, but fails to be clear
with the sentences providing the breakdown of the credit score. When this author provides the
percentages, the paragraph sentence structure and word choice become confusing.

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