add a conclusion and gramatically correct my personal statement for college app

SoccerBoss
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My name is xxxxx xxxxxx  . I am 34 years old. I am an international student from xxxxx xxxxxx where my family of three brothers and five sisters still lives. I went to high school in xxxx xxxx  and one of the classes I loved was my Sociology class because it taught me about the differences between communities and sociology issues. It opened my eyes to the different cultures and communities that exist all over the world thus, helping me understand and accept them. Cultures and communities are different based on race, religion, sex and geographic location.

I grew up in a close knit and religious family, and I am the only one who proceeded to University because I wanted to advance my education. I worked hard to get a scholarship from the ministry of higher education in xxxx xxx  for Social Service. (I completed my Bachelor’s degree in Social Services in 2007, and I had training in hospital with children as a social worker in a hospital for six months. These children suffer from cancer, anemia and lack of oxygen to the brain. The experience was amazing and I learned a lot from it. I was filled with grief from seeing these children going through that kind of pain and how their suffering was affecting their families, some to the point of breaking. To bring a little joy to their lives, I brought entertainment programs in collaboration with the children’s department.

I started worked in xxxx xxxx xx xx x as a patient care coordinator for four years. This profession has taught me patience, recognition of helplessness as well as acceptance the reality of the challenges being faced in communities. My interest in social work comes from studying individuals, groups and communities and improved social work is closely linked to the rest of the other branches of social sciences. Social work also unites them as a means to improve conditions and (humanitarian situation) as well as to work on changing the chronic problems facing it and the extent of people dealing with the problems/issues with positivity. These issues include: education, poverty, addiction, criminality, disability, family problems and the most important thing, women s rights.

I have also attended many lectures under the title “Adolescents: Victims of mistreating and misunderstanding” as well as “family violence causes & solutions,” which strengthened my resolve to advance my studies in Social sciences. I want to help people that cannot help themselves. These people, a majority of whom are women, reside in my country. I believe that women can be leaders anywhere and at any time if they possess persistency, determination and cooperation within their community and they must go beyond the obstacles. I want to stand with and assist xxxx women who are helpless and not able to live a normal life because of our own customs and traditions as well as those of others that are no longer logical. That is why I want to study social service to serve women. I want to be one of the women leaders to make a positive impact in their lives, and science is the strongest voice to achieve the impossible and unexpected goals. I want women to have the freedom to make their own decision without injustice and domination.

In 2013, I started studying the English language in xxx x x x x x x x University. I learned a lot from this institute and it served as my family in America. There were many activities we engaged in, including volunteer work. I am very passionate about giving back to the community, and so I loved volunteering. I aspire to study my Masters degree at xxxx xxxx. I will achieve my ambitions and dreams in the future because xxxxxx xxx will give me a chance to improve my social skills and experience to be a successful woman.

 This university has a program has several important advantages that will help me be gained and knowledge of what can not be achieved in any other university I am deeply committed to the service of others, and most specifically to the service of troubled or neglect ,because of The social and economic disparity evidenced in so many urban settings throughout the world today through community outreach in this program, as well as research and seek to resolve economic and social disparities, which settles all urban areas and , through the study programs, implementation and evaluation it easy to find the best solution to poverty eradication . in addition I have an entrepreneurial spirit severe for the advancement forward for the development of self-confidence and reduce anxiety and depression and social isolation of the disabled through entertainment programs where you will give them hope because I am today optimistic person and care and all this software improve social work skills, I am sympathetic person and a good listener with acumen it gives me merit and qualifications to deal with all segments of society because I am I hope to find work in the future in the field of social work that would allow me to help relieve some of the more social pressing problems faced by the communities most at the moment where it means a lot to me and satisfaction to myself as a Specialist social successful and sophisticated .


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(Top Tutor) Daniel C.
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School: UIUC
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