revise essay

Anonymous
timer Asked: Nov 4th, 2016

Question description

1. In the essay In Praise of the F Word, Mary Sherry states that the threat of flunking is a positive teaching tool. She believes that students can be more successful if they have a “healthy fear of failure”. Write an argumentative essay in which you argue against or support Sherry’s opinion about the relationship between grades and academic success.

INTRODUCTION:

a) Hook

b) Summary of the selected article (start with the author’s main idea): 5-8 sentences long

c) Student’s thesis statement= your opinion on the topic that you will support in the essay

BODY PARAGRAPHS:

-# 1 and 2- your position on the issue -

# 3- counter-argument (opposing view point) -

# 4- acknowledgement of the counter-argument or refutation of the counter-argument

CONCLUSION:

a) refer back to the author of the article

b) paraphrase your thesis and briefly restate your supporting examples

c) final concluding thoughts

Essay requirements: Citation Requirements: .

a) Models for Writers textbook .

b) 3 other sources- can be online or printed You need to incorporate a summary of the selected article in the introductory paragraph. • The body paragraphs of the essay must include at least 2 direct quotes and 2 paraphrases. A quote cannot be more than 1-2 sentences long.

ESL 5 Argumentative Essay Outline Template INTRODUCTION: a) Hook  The high school education system of passing students regardless of whether or not they perform is not appropriate, most people argue out that high school students are greatly affected by family issues and as a result, they cannot perform as expected, it is therefore fair if they are passed since their excuse is valid. On the other hand, passing all students regardless of their peformance results in most of the students graduating without the necessary content needed in the job market. A good solution to the problem would be to introduce flunking so that students work hard enough. b) Summary of the selected articleIn this article, Sherry states that “ the current education system passes students who mostly have not grasped the course as the society fears to make the student feel that they are not performing well academically, social issues like divorce and drugs affect a student’s performance in school but not as much as their attitude”. This results in an influx of graduates who are half-baked and cannot apply the basic principles of class work in the field, some drop out and opt for adult education at an advanced age. A solution to this problem would be to introduce flunking which will make the students fear failure and hence improve their grades and develop interest in class work. c) Thesis statement: I agree with the author that flunking should be introduced in schools as a way to ensure that students graduate with a substantial amount of knowledge, however, it should be done in moderation with careful consideration. BODY PARAGRAPHS: Body Paragraph # 1a) Topic SentenceThe current education system adds no value to a student’s intellectual capacity since the students know they will be passed whether they study or not, as such, they do not study and perform poorly making them unable to apply the knowledge in the field b) Example- support A high school graduate intern in my mother’s workplace could not even use the basic computer packages that are taught in the elementary stages of school. Body Paragraph # 2a) Topic SentenceFlunking is an effective tool for triggering the student to strive for academic excellence. c) Example- support The son to my sister was being disobedient and distracting others in class, my sister told him that the teacher was going to flunk him, this resulted in the boy developing fear and he corrected his bad behavior. Body Paragraph # 3- counter-argument (opposing view point) a) Topic SentenceIn reality, many students may be negatively impacted by flunking even though it has been effective in making a few students hardworking and accountable. Example- support If for instance a patient with a cold is prescribed certain drugs by the doctor to treat the cold, the same prescription may have a detrimental effect on another patient with similar symptoms. Body Paragraph # 4- acknowledgement of the counter-argument or refutation of the counter-argument a) Topic SentenceIn the past flunking was used and the students performed well, there were no cases of half-baked or incompetent graduates since people viewed it as a positive teaching tool. b) Example- support My grandparents are products of the old education system which molded them to be hardworking and accountable people. CONCLUSION: Mary Sherry strongly advocates for re-introduction of flunking in schools to help produce fully baked graduates just like in the past with co-operation from students, parents and teachers. Flunking is an effective solution to the problem of high school students graduating without the necessary skills, however it should be introduced in moderation and continually reviewed to ensure that the students are not affected emotionally by the rather strict teaching tool.
Surname 1 Name Professor Course Date Flunking According to Mary Sherry, the high school education system of passing students regardless of whether or not they perform is not appropriate, most people argue out that high school students are greatly affected by family issues and as a result, they cannot perform as expected, it is therefore fair if they are passed since their excuse is valid. On the other hand, she states passing all students regardless of their peformance results in most of the students graduating without the necessary content needed in the job market. Mary Sherry suggests that a good solution to the problem would be to introduce flunking so that students work hard enough. If the student after years of toil, joins the job market without the skills, and intellectual capacity expected of them, it shows that it was meaningless for the parents to invest their finances in education, moreover, a lot of time is wasted in school without any gain in knowledge. From the article, a number of factors contribute to students graduating without any meaningful content. One factor that causes students to graduate without content is drug and substance abuse. Peer pressure lures the teenagers to abuse drugs whose side effects make them lose concentration and memory in class, thus, they hardly understand the important concepts taught in class. Another reason is the lack of a strict and accountable system of grading students. Even when students have not grasped concepts in class the education system has an obligation of making them pass and graduate. Surname 2 Flunking is an effective tool for triggering the student to strive for academic excellence. It involves making the students repeat if they do not attain the minimum requirements needed to proceed to the next level of their studies. A good example of the effectiveness in flunking is when the son to my sister was being disobedient and distracting others in class, my sister told him that the teacher was going to flunk him, this resulted in the boy developing fear and he corrected his bad behavior. Flunking as a teaching tool is good in keeping the students in check since the positive fear of being flunked makes them attentive in class and hardworking. Psychological problems affecting the student like family divorce and drugs are not the main factors contributing to poor peformance in school since there are students who come from troubled homes and still prioritize education emerging as achievers. Therefore the lack of accountability in academic performance makes the students relax and lose interest in education since they will still be passed by the system. On the other hand, in reality, many students may be negatively impacted by flunking even though it has been effective in making a few students hardworking and accountable. If for instance a patient with a cold is prescribed certain drugs by the doctor to treat the cold, the same prescription may have a detrimental effect on another patient with similar symptoms. A good way to test the effectiveness of a system is to use a fixed number of students as a reflection of the whole population assuming that the students are a good mix of the population. What works on one person does not necessarily work on another one. Flunking can even lead to a worsening of the system whereby students become dishonest in exams so as to ensure that they meet the requirements to proceed to the next level. Flunking could also promote stigmatization and low self-esteem since the students who are made to repeat a particular class will be regarded as weak ones with few people willing to associate with them. There are cases of students with learning Surname 3 disabilities, flunking for them would not be of use since they are slow learners who require consideration and teachers to be lenient on them since they would not understand much. Scaring a child so as to make them hard work will kill the self-drive of children and willingness to grasp concepts other than just memorization, students will study for the sake of passing exams rather than grasping the concepts to apply them in practical problem solving scenarios. However, in the past flunking was used and the students performed well, there were no cases of half-baked or incompetent graduates since people viewed it as a positive teaching tool. My grandparents are products of the old education system which molded them to be hardworking and accountable people. Flunking policy was used in the past with many students being a product of the system, which bore good fruits. Although the author cannot provide evidence of flunking effectiveness in the current generation, elderly people used the system and it proved effective. Even though no recent data from research can be used to justify and verify the effectiveness of the teaching tool, the fact that that there are beneficiaries of the system from the previous generation who have proved as responsible adults is enough to justify flunking. The negative mentality on flunking should change since flunking is primarily designed to ensure that the student has long term benefits of the education system as opposed to the short term benefit of being passed so as to graduate. Flunking can only be effective if the teachers work in collaboration with the parents to ensure that they are strict on the teaching tool and failure to attain the required grades would lead to automatic repeating of the year of study. The excuses made that the student’s poor academic peformance is an irreversible situation should not be condoned since anyone when triggered to act as expected can do it as long as they are given the right amount of pressure or motivation. Surname 4 Mary Sherry has a first-hand experience on the consequences of dropping out of school due to low academic performance from the adult students she teaches. Most of them made bad choices when they were teenagers like abuse of drugs, attending parties and not being attentive in class. They regret the poor choices they made but cannot fully blame themselves since they were too young to make decisions and lacked the proper guidance. Therefore, teenagers should not be left to make decisions on their own especially the decisions that will affect their future since their judgments may be easily misguided. If parents and teachers are allowed to implement a more accountable education system, the students will have a good form of fear to conform since they do not want to disappoint their parents that way, most of them will not engage in practices that distract them out of school work. The current education system is not appropriate since it passes all students regardless of whether they achieve good grades or not, the drawback of the education system is that most of the students graduate without the necessary content needed in the job market; a solution to the problem is to introduce flunking. Flunking very beneficial since the graduate’s self-esteem is boosted, they gain a competitive advantage in the job market due to their good academic records and promotes a culture of hard work and perfection. For the teaching tool to be effective, the student should be made aware that the system is there to favor them and help them in the future; also, the students should be given a chance to negotiate on the terms and conditions of the system so that he or she is comfortable with the system. Mary Sherry strongly advocates for re-introduction of flunking in schools to help produce fully baked graduates just like in the past with co-operation from students, parents and teachers. Flunking is an effective solution to the problem of high school students graduating without the necessary skills, however it should be introduced in moderation and continually Surname 5 reviewed to ensure that the students are not affected emotionally by the rather strict teaching tool.

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