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INTRODUCTION: Excellent start to the paper that makes me want to read more. Nice transition to your topic. I should see two sentences that represent your thesis statement and preview of main points; I think at the moment you have too many sentences. ORGANIZATION: Be consistent with the following: a.) internal summaries that describe what the point was about before you move to the next point, b.) transitions that connect one main point to the next, and c.) topic sentences that tell me what the main points are and how they support your thesis. CONTENT: Lots of great information here. I like the inclusion of details and explanations. At times I think using more description and even definitions would be useful. Great job incorporating your outside sources. More framing of the main points will help the overall logical flow of your paper. CONCLUSION: Fair closure for the paper, though I'd like to see a bit more elaboration here. Perhaps go back to your attention-getter of your paper? Be sure to concisely restate your thesis and review your main points. CITATIONS: Works Cited needs minimal revision. In-text citations also need minor revision. FORMAT: Consistent errors in grammar, spelling, and sentence structure. Make sure to give this paper a good read-through on your own or, ideally, with someone else.

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1 Acrophobia Do you recall a time in life when you were at the top of a really tall building or a tree, and could not look over the side of the building or even climb down the tree? I have, long time ago when I was young I once climbed a tall tree and getting to the top I looked down and I could not tolerate the height. I was too afraid and nervous to climb down. I could not even scream for help or alter any word. Due to the fear, I lost control and fell off only to land and get stuck on one of the branches of the tree; not far from the top. I only stayed at the branches of the tree, shivering and wondering if a miracle could happen and I get myself down the tree. This is what is called acrophobia or in other words the fear of heights (Claid and Emilyn 2017). I believe that a lot of people are afraid of heights. It is not wrong to be acrophobic because to an extend it is a defense mechanism. Our bodies use this mechanism to avoid climbing to tree tops, peeping over the side of really tall buildings, as well as walking off cliffs. The problem comes in when a natural occurrence occurs and to rescue oneself, there is no option rather than climbing to the top of a tree or building. There are different causes of acrophobia even though the fear might be unrealistic and exaggerated. However, researchers have conducted research at different levels to establish what is really meant by the fear of heights. The real question is whether acrophobia is a normal phobia or not, or whether it depends on the different individuals. The main symptoms of acrophobia that are evident when a person is at a high place include dizziness, increased sweating, stomach upsets, shaking or shivering, dry mouth, nausea, and the inability to speak. It is evident that the greatest symptom of them all is the fear of death. On the extreme, some of the symptoms develop into a raged anxiety attack. Some of the 2 symptoms that dominate the writer are nausea, shaking and the fear of death (Kapfhammer and Hans-Peter et al. 2015). Even though some people may proof that they are not afraid of heights, the mention of the word death especially when it comes to the writer engaging in events that may cause it is frightening in itself. I cannot stomach events entailing heights; climbing trees and standing at the top of tall buildings. There are number of factors which come in when in need of establishing the causes of acrophobia. One of the most common rulings and explanations for the causes of the fear of heights deduce that it is an intensified response to a natural fear of harm or death that is perceived to occur when one falls from a typically high point. The theory holds that every human being has a natural fear for heights, but with some individuals, the fear is too much exaggerated due to past exposure to traumatic experiences in regard to heights (Huppert, 2014). Have you ever experienced a near slip from a really high place? This is my case. I fell from the near top of a truly tall tree, but I got stuck on one of its branches and did not reach the ground. Ever since the experience, this serves as response mechanism of protection from possible future slips or falls. Another theory regarding the causes of the fear of heights holds that the fear could sometimes be non-associative. It may not be as a result of a past traumatic experience, it may rather be ingrained in an individual’s psyche to guard them from danger. It is difficult to associate the cause of such fear for a person who has never had an experience with heights. This simply means that some people are uncomfortable with heights. Again, acrophobia could be associated with trauma seen in movies, television, or any traumatic encounter with other persons in regard to heights (Barlow, David and Kristen 2018). 3 In the recent years, psychologists have conducted research and studies to establish if crawling babies can cross a thick piece of glass on a steep drop off. The mothers on the other side called the babies to cross over the piece of glass to the other side but it did not work. The babies could not cross over the glass to the other side besides the fact that they could see and hear their mothers calling. This is a clear indication that acrophobia could be ingrained in human beings or partially in their genetics (Claid and Emilyn 2017). Because this is about survival tactics and instincts. Despite the fact that I was not anywhere injured when I fell from my past experience of falling from a tall tree, I still fear heights. This is a defense mechanism to avoid standing or climbing to the top of high places. The greatest treatment of acrophobia is medical prescription which can help to minimize the fear of heights. This does not cure acrophobia, instead, it covers them. Researchers have identified that the side effects of the medications could turn out to be more severe than the fear of heights. The best treatment of the fear is cognitive behavior therapy which entails exposing the victim to heights in order to assist them to establish coping skills to increase their confidence. The skills could also help the acrophobic persons to change their thoughts and reactions towards heights (Hofmann, Stefan and Michael 2017). I believe that I can also go about my fear of heights by really facing them in a different way than I have ever before. This could be possible by taking different dimensions to overcome the fear. I prefer first climbing the stairs to the top of a really tall building and gather courage and walk close to the edges and glance at the bottom of the building or maybe have a try to do a roller coaster in Six Flag. This could happen severally until I get used to watching the bottom of the building from its top. The same could also be done by climbing up and down a tall tree until I get used to it. 4 It is extremely hard for an individual to deal with acrophobia. It is evident that everyone has a fear for heights, even if minimal fear it is still fear for heights. The only proposed way to overcome such fears is facing them. Once fear is overcome, one acquires an incredible feeling of a conqueror. 5 Works Cited Barlow, David H., and Kristen K. Ellard. "Anxiety and Related Disorders." Noba textbook series: Psychology. Champaign, IL: DEF publishers. DOI: nobaproject. com, 2018. Claid, Emilyn. "Walking On Glass." Emotion, Space and Society, 2017. Hofmann, Stefan G., and Michael W. Otto. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Social Anxiety Disorder: Evidence-Based and Disorder Specific Treatment Techniques. Routledge, 2017. Huppert, D., and C. Starostzik. "Fear of heights? Acrophobia can be overcome (interview by Dr. Christine Starostzik)." MMW Fortschritte der Medizin 156.1, 2014. Kapfhammer, Hans-Peter, et al. "Visual height intolerance and acrophobia: clinical characteristics and comorbidity patterns." European archives of psychiatry and clinical neuroscience 265.5, 2015.
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Just what I was looking for! Super helpful.

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