The 5 Love Languages
Gary Chapman
Contributed by Roseanne Meinecke
Chapter 11
Summary

Psychologists state that love forms a connection to other emotional needs such as security, significance, and self-appreciation. The author says that the feeling of being loved by your partner gives a sense of security and of self-worth.  By having someone who loves you as much as when you first met, you feel that you are worth loving building self-esteem improving your quality of life.

The author argues that if married people do not feel good about themselves and their self-worth, personality differences can become prevalent and more noticeable. This results in a struggle to prove one’s self-worth and significance which in turn can lead to arguments and the deterioration of the marriage. Chapman addresses the fact that love is usually not the answer for most situations, but it enables a secure and open environment in which people can explore their emotions and look for answers. When love is present in a marriage, the couple feel safe to discuss any problems without fear of backlash or condemnation, making it easier to resolve their problems.

Analysis

Love is the epitome of success in marriage without which, most relationships deteriorate. The reader gets the understanding that love is not the only solution to things, but it undoubtedly provides a platform through which even the unlovable spouse can regain love through understanding. Two people cannot walk together unless they agree, and the foundation of agreement is the concept of love which truly makes all the difference when it is present.

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