The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Mark Manson
Contributed by Micheal Celestin
Chapter 7

We constantly impose to avoid failure in every possible way. We brought it to the point at which failing is seen as a devastating consequence which will ensure that we won't be able to achieve our ultimate goals. In the author's opinion, failure is a key element when we refer to our lives and we should learn to embrace it. By failing multiple times, we eventually get polished enough in order to succeed. There is another frustrating loop in these terms because when we have a big desire and we fail we tend to stop doing anything just to avoid that feeling. Another wrong conception is that in order to actually get involved in something we first need to get motivated. Even so, Manson believes that this is more of a myth rather than reality. Once we start something we tend to get more inspired and more motivated. So in the end, if our desire is to pursue motivation we first need to act for it. It can be seen as a chain in which action, once it was started, will spur the motivation and inspiration required for further activities. Based on all of these we can state that the resolution is not really what matters, but what really counts is actually to do something. When your metric is to only do something we will see that even failure will tend to help you achieve your dreams.


The entire chapter revolves around the idea that failure is not a negative consequence and that pain can bring you more advantages than happiness in some circumstances. The author continues using personal experiences in order to stimulate us to become more engaged in his advice and also to bring to life his words. He describes himself as being a lout and a cheapskate because, in the beginning, he was afraid of failing and getting hurt. When he eventually managed to overcome these anxiety problems, new opportunities arose. Now he is more successful than he was before but he still states that it requires a lot of time and desire in order to polish this skill. What we always miss when we set a goal is that a multitude of arbitrary achievements won't be the one who will eventually generate happiness. Happiness is generated when we have the possibility to grow and there is no way to reach this state without first failing. In the end, we can conclude by stating that the magnitude of our success is fully dependent on the number of failures we had in life.

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